​The worst part about being a haunted doll is the children. Don’t get me wrong; I’m not one of those guys who hates kids. Most of the time, I’m cool with them.
 
But you know, it’s hard to keep up the illusion of being an inanimate object when some 2-year-old half-wit is drooling all over your buttons or throwing you on the ground to step on you just because his parents told him not to do that thing.
 
Sometimes it gets lonely, too, I guess. I’m the only haunted doll in this entire collection of hom...