Living in the past is quicksand. Whether you view the past as beautiful and better than the present or horrible and laced with pain, you’re caught in quicksand. The past is an especially dangerous quicksand that no one else can help you escape. The more you idealize or demonize the people and events of the past, the deeper you’ll sink and the more miserable you’ll become.

Anyone who comes along to ask forgiveness for their role in your past is extending a hand to help you from your quagmire. ...