The views expressed in the following are entirely my own and do not necessarily reflect those of my employer, immediate family, or any other entities I represent in different capacities.
I am beyond angry at the recent SCOTUS decision. In much of my online discourse, there has been a bit of confusion as to why, so please allow me to explain.
Let's start with the obvious: I'm not a father. That doesn't automatically make me hate babies, but I can see how my thoughts could be perceived that way.
In fact, this decision affects me in no way whatsoever. So, why am I still so angry I'm seeing red and my hands won't stop shaking?
Because most of my friends are women. I have a few male friends, but mostly, I find connections more often with women. (Who knows, maybe I was a woman in a previous life. That would explain a lot, actually.)
Most—and I'm talking easily 90% of those many women I know personally, no exaggeration—have been raped or sexually abused at some point in their lives.
This next part is important, y'all: EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM WAS MADE TO FEEL LIKE IT WAS SOMEHOW THEIR FAULT. This is especially true for young girls being abused by a trusted, adult male figure.
This is also important: every single one of those women will carry the mental and emotional burden of their abuse for the rest of their lives. Often in silence.
Let's be honest. Men are never really punished for rape. Our bodies are not regulated in any way. The blame always falls on the woman, as if men somehow can't control themselves.
(I assure you, we can.)
In fact, women are punished in ways that I have only learned within the past few years. Let's start with the "pink tax," shall we? Did you know, some women's products are often priced higher than comparable products for men? (Feel free to look it up for more info.)
It's known that women still aren't paid the same amount as men in similar career positions. Why is that?
Oh, how about this little kicker: a woman cannot have HER OWN TUBES tied without the consent of a husband. That would easily prevent abortions, right? Yes, there are some exceptions to this rule. But the very fact that, say, a girl of legal age can't simply choose to have a procedure done to not be able to get pregnant is absolutely absurd.
Okay, so that procedure can lead to complications she might later regret. Fair point, so let's discuss. If that's the case, why don't we require those same men/boys who we've previously established can't control themselves anyway to have vasectomies? They're reversible, not to mention safer, so everyone wins, right?
Oh, right. Men's bodies are never regulated in any way. Even rape charges are often shrugged off for dumb reasons that never make any sense. I'm sure some charges actually stick that don't appear in the media, but from the accounts I know of personally, it never happens. And I've heard a lot of accounts.
Because someone will say it, I'll address this point as well: even if a woman does come forward when an incident happens, she's usually the one who receives the blame. This is why many women won't ever tell anyone. To them, it is not only painful to talk about it, but they believe that no one will take them seriously. So what options does a woman truly have? She can't easily prevent unwanted pregnancy, and even if she does want a child, she's punished for it.
"But the babies," you say. Is any of this really about babies? No. Of course it isn't. Don't believe me? If we as a country truly cared about babies, maternity leave would be longer. (There would also be equal paternity leave.) Mothers would have more support and resources. Men would have their bodies regulated in a similar manner.
Instead, women are punished for choosing to be mothers. Or, in some cases, choosing not to be mothers.
Sometimes, they don't have a choice at all. Motherhood is forced on them, then they are immediately told to fend for themselves.
"But, she should have controlled herself." See above. Your argument is invalid. If men can have unregulated sex all willy-nilly, women deserve the same right.
Y'all, this was never about babies. Even those of us who are adamantly pro-choice love babies. Yes, even grouchy old Topher occasionally smiles at a wee little bundle of squirming human larva.
This is, and has always been, about control. Did you know marriage used to be a contract between families? A woman was exchanged, without her consent, as part of a land agreement, or for a couple of goats, or whatever else bullshit reason. And THEN the man who married her could do whatever he pleased to her because a man could not legally rape his spouse. SHE WAS OBLIGATED TO SLEEP WITH HIM. SHE WAS NOT GIVEN A CHOICE.
Let that disgusting fact sink in, folks, because it is horrifying.
It is almost as if women are somehow viewed as less than men in this society. Surely not.
And I haven't even addressed the medical complications that can arise during pregnancy. Maybe new laws will address this. I can't speak to that, but I'd at least recommend women only write whatever laws the states decide to pass.
A woman deserves as much autonomy over her own body as a man. Period.
You don't like abortion? Good. Me neither. My advice to you, then, is to not have one. But to make it illegal for a woman to have any say over her own body is beyond my comprehension. I really would like to hear a reasoned, logical argument, but I have yet to hear anyone make one. All I ever hear are variations of personal religious beliefs, "but the babies," or some smartass will note that pro-choicers who are standing up for women's rights were not aborted.
Folks, that's not good enough. Not by a cosmic longshot.
That is why I'm so angry.