There's a new movie coming out called Anonymous which will explain to all of us how Shakespeare's plays were really written by Edward De Vere. Come on, guys. Edward De Vere was cute as a button and he could write passable sonnets, and — wait for it — he did know Shakespeare. But that basically is all the evidence there is. Everything else is willful misreadings of things in the plays to find secret clues where De Vere is supposedly announcing his authorship. The Da Vinci Code for theatre buffs.

But why stop there? I've decided to write up a theory that the plays of Christopher Marlowe were written by Truman Capote. And who says Moby-Dick wasn't written by Ernest Hemingway? And Zelda FitzGerald must have written the novels of Jane Austen during her lucid periods. She wrote Wuthering Heights during her non-lucid periods.

Anybody else want to play? Who really wrote what?