Love Lessons
The other day, my hubs and I reached a significant milestone in marriage. Long marriages may not be the bed of roses those elderly couples who get interviewed talk about. You know the ones where the little old lady gazes lovingly at her partner and they joke and chuckle about the good times. He teases her, she blushes, and the interview leaves everyone feeling joyful and hopeful that they’ll be there someday, too.
But, I’m here to say, long marriages survive. That’s it.
Survival depends on lots of things: patience, understanding, acceptance, and optimism to name a few.
Long marriages follow life’s path and the older a marriage grows, the more difficulties it has encountered. Deaths of parents, in-laws, siblings. Illnesses, accidents, financial setbacks, watching a partner go through challenging times without a magic wand to wave over them to fix things. These things are HARD.
But love can sustain a marriage. When we opened our cards the other day, they were eerily similar. Both talked about the ups and downs, about hanging in together, about what life brings. And then, oddly, I turned a page in my day planner and found this quote:
“Happiness is in the small stuff. It’s not in the big life-changing things. It’s in the every day. – Paul Dolan, Behavioural Scientist.
I believe this. (See the above about patience, understanding etc)
How to sustain a marriage? Be kind. Be thoughtful. Be helpful. Be faithful. This goes for both partners. And for pity’s sake, have a sense of humour!
Being these things will help love survive the challenges of life. This will bring you (major reasons for divorce notwithstanding) to decades-long survival. Date nights are very helpful, as are weekends away, if possible. Know that there’s an ebb and flow to marriage, just as there is in life.
These are the lessons I’ve learned in the 45 years I’ve been hitched to the man I chose.
In Not-So-Blue Christmas, I have a hero and heroine at different stages of grief after losing their long-term partners. They’d planned for long marriages, had fully expected to be one of those old happy couples.
But love comes around again sometimes, and Kirk and Miranda learn to take another chance, bringing all their experience to bear. This is one happy ending you don’t want to miss!
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B014DU4GKC
Available on Kindle Unlimited!Not-So-Blue Christmas
But, I’m here to say, long marriages survive. That’s it.
Survival depends on lots of things: patience, understanding, acceptance, and optimism to name a few.
Long marriages follow life’s path and the older a marriage grows, the more difficulties it has encountered. Deaths of parents, in-laws, siblings. Illnesses, accidents, financial setbacks, watching a partner go through challenging times without a magic wand to wave over them to fix things. These things are HARD.
But love can sustain a marriage. When we opened our cards the other day, they were eerily similar. Both talked about the ups and downs, about hanging in together, about what life brings. And then, oddly, I turned a page in my day planner and found this quote:
“Happiness is in the small stuff. It’s not in the big life-changing things. It’s in the every day. – Paul Dolan, Behavioural Scientist.
I believe this. (See the above about patience, understanding etc)
How to sustain a marriage? Be kind. Be thoughtful. Be helpful. Be faithful. This goes for both partners. And for pity’s sake, have a sense of humour!
Being these things will help love survive the challenges of life. This will bring you (major reasons for divorce notwithstanding) to decades-long survival. Date nights are very helpful, as are weekends away, if possible. Know that there’s an ebb and flow to marriage, just as there is in life.
These are the lessons I’ve learned in the 45 years I’ve been hitched to the man I chose.
In Not-So-Blue Christmas, I have a hero and heroine at different stages of grief after losing their long-term partners. They’d planned for long marriages, had fully expected to be one of those old happy couples.
But love comes around again sometimes, and Kirk and Miranda learn to take another chance, bringing all their experience to bear. This is one happy ending you don’t want to miss!
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B014DU4GKC
Available on Kindle Unlimited!Not-So-Blue Christmas
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