What is it about the ‘f-bomb’ that is so darn effective? The word is vulgar and overused, and yet we continue to drop it at the slightest excuse. And no, I am not proud to admit that I am a member of the ‘we’ that overuses that word.

Over the years I have made sporadic attempts at cleaning up my language. I am a writer. Theoretically, I should have a large enough vocabulary to be able to replace that curse with something more creative. Yet when I am really frustrated, or really angry, nothing seems to verbally express that emotion quite as well as the f-bomb. “Intercourse you!” is simply not satisfying, and “What the fornicate?!” just makes me giggle.

At one point, I came to the conclusion that it was the ‘uck’ part of the word that was really providing the verbal satisfaction. ‘Uck’ is a guttural sound. It has some oomph to it. So I tried various other ‘uck’ words as substitutes. It turns out that calling someone a mother-ducker is just silly. Mother-mucker? Nope. Mother-schmucker? Still not quite right. Mother-pucker? Not exactly an insult if you have a kid who plays hockey.

So, try as I might, I still drop the f-bomb from time to time. I try to keep it safely locked behind my lips, allowing it out only on special occasions … like when I dropped the cast iron skillet on my foot. If that wasn’t an f-bomb-worthy event, I don’t know what is!