This post is part of a series to foster understanding about depression.
Other posts in this series include the following:
11/08/2023 – Part 1: Revealing Challenges to Understanding
11/15/2023 – Part 2: The Internal Cacophony

I grew up knowing that my mom was a diabetic.

Even as a small child, I can recall seeing my mom test her sugar, give herself insulin shots, and more. I remember having conversations about what she should and should not eat, because of the effects she might have to deal with later.

To me, it wasn’t odd. It was just what Mom had to do.

To be transparent, though she lived with it for decades, my mom was never the greatest at taking care of her diabetes. More often than not, she ate the things she knew she shouldn’t. And, on more than one occasion, someone in our family would get mom to drink orange juice, or push a sugar solution into her mouth to bring up her sugar and bring her to a more coherent state.

For me, this also was not that odd. It is just what our family had to do.

It’s not exactly news that anyone who lives with diabetes, high blood pressure, thyroid issues, or any number of medical issues can often make a dramatic difference in their quality of life when they actively take steps to manage it every day.

The same is true when we discuss issues of mental health.

While diagnoses of depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, etc are unique in their own right, there are still a myriad of everyday, intentional steps that can be taken to improve one’s quality of life.

LIVING PREVENTATIVELY

Even though I was diagnosed in 2015, it took me longer to realize the impact every day decisions had on my mental health. Specifically, I had to realize how much playing video games until 2:00 AM every night affected me negatively. First off, I was using video games as a drug to numb the chaos inside of me. On more than one occasion I would ignore responsibilities simply so I could zone out in front of a screen Second, while I have always had erratic sleep patterns, staying up so late so frequently only deteriorated my ability to deal with mental health struggles.

Somewhere along the line, I began to realize that my everyday decisions truly made an immense difference in how I felt. This, in turn, made an immense difference in what kind of husband, dad, and pastor I was able to be.

When I am taking care of myself I can be more present. I am much more pleasant to be around. I can be more engaged. I can think more clearly.

THAT DOESN’T ALWAYS WORK

While everyday decisions make a big impact on my emotional well-being, there are still moments, or even days, when depression becomes loud. This could be due to stress, the aforementioned erratic sleep patterns, my medicines not working as well, or any number of items. One of the biggest lessons I have had to learn is how to respond when depression gets loud and everything inside of me feels broken.

While each person is unique, here are some of my go-to approaches for those moments:

Complete a basic, but necessary task. This could include washing the dishes, mowing the lawn, folding laundry, or any number of items. The simple act of completing a task helps me shift from feelings of worthlessness to a sense of accomplishment.Engage my body or mind. Sometimes I run. Sometimes I write. Either way, I begin to process through what my mind is telling me.Go to sleep. Whether this means going to bed early or taking a nap, sometimes sleep is the best reset for my body and mind. No, it doesn’t always fix everything, but I can view the world through a clearer lens when I have slept.Use the NAMI crisis text line.  This is for those more severe moments when depression is not only loud, but suicidal ideation has crept back in. I am healthier now, so this is much more rare, but at times I have used the crisis line just to process my thoughts and be heard. In every case, it has helped me feel as though I am not alone and helped me gain perspective.

Each person is unique, and so I recognize that what works for me may not work for someone else. I would love to hear about approaches you take when you can feel your mental health in a negative place.

But for me…these things are all just part of what I need to do.

For mental health resources in your area visit the National Alliance on Mental Illness.

If you know of someone who struggles with suicidal thoughts, encourage them to text HOME to 741741.
A trained volunteer at the National Crisis Text Line will anonymously help navigate whatever crisis they are going through.