That can be a depressing topic! But not all lasts or ends are bad, right? I’ve come to accept, though not always gracefully, the lasts in my life are simply a beginning to what comes next. And though I don’t always know what that looks like, if I trust in God, it usually turns out more beautiful than I expected.

However, m aybe that’s why I love writing, because I can “control” the narrative and the “lasts” in my books (so long as the characters don’t have something else planned!)

I always tell my daughters that I was put on this earth to be a mom to them. In my heart of hearts, I know that was the job He had planned for me and it was one that I was both eager and terrified to take on. Seriously, terror rounded every corner for me as a young mom. Age and experience didn’t help alleviate those fears, either.

For 20 years, I was a stay at home mom, first a foremost. It was the job that never stopped and the one that I relished. Looking back on that time, it was truly the best years of my life.

Now, during that time, I was also able to work from home. First as a website designer (with novice skills at best), then as a portrait editor and album designer. Eventually I became a photographer, then spent a brief stint as an SEO copyrighter, finally becoming a self-published author and home remodeler.

Are you still here? Did I lose you, yet?

Yes, there were numerous things I was able to try, but the mom hat was the most important to me.

Like most parents, I was thrilled to experience the “firsts.” The first time our babies crawled. The first time they walked, talked, and slept through the night (not necessarily in that order). Then there was the first day of school. (Man! Was that a heartbreaker!!) Watching that tiny little girl suddenly be a “big” girl to take on a full day away from momma. And then to add salt to the wound, the youngest started two years later, leaving momma alone all day long.

But, as life does, it goes on at a speed that we don’t really comprehend. It isn’t until we reach some other milestone that we think, “damn, how did we get here?!”

One day, I turned around and they were grown. No longer were they “needing” momma to tuck them in, because those independent teenagers were taking the stage to do solos, they were attending dances, going to football games, playing sports and driving.

Who can forget the driving?! Probably the scariest time in this momma’s life because I was watching her drive – without me, and praying to God that she made it safely to her destination.

It was an exciting time for them and I marveled as they maneuvered their young lives and all that was coming next. It was time for the lasts. The oldest would be graduating and had been accepted to college.

**Oops. Nope! Covid! “No lasts for you 2020!”**

Prom? – Sorry! No-go. But you can come back next year! (Gross! No!)
Popshow? – Okay, but it will be virtual. Enjoy!
Senior Walkthrough? – Oops! How about a drive-by parade!
Graduation? – Sure, but it will be a month late and only 4 people can attend.

It was a strange time, for sure. I mourned that my girl didn’t get those lasts, but she and her friends handled it with such grace. Then again, what choice did they have?

And yet, here we are four years later and our 2020 seniors are finally getting their lasts. College graduations are beginning and they are getting to say goodbye to their peers, standing in front of family and friends who get to witness the culmination of their hard work as they take the next big step into the real world.

I’m in awe of their resilience and so happy to finally get to see these young people get the lasts, they have earned and deserve.

XO

~T