​Theme: “White Wedding” By: Billy Idol ​Quote: “People are weird. When we find someone with weirdness that is compatible with ours, we team up and call it love.” – Dr. Seuss
It’s been about 3 years since I posted on this blog, needless to say I failed to stay active as I intended, but I’m going to work on fixing that. My goal is to post at regular intervals and see where it goes from there.
 
For those who have been wondering, I have spent most of my blog energy on my YouTube Vlog. Rather than recap everything the past 3 years have had I’ll just leave this link so people can check some stuff out. (https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLcrHYCyHh7BbBd-49n-KfVao2-GVR1RgZ).
 
Overall, a few big things have happened. I got married! Whoo-hoo! I love my hubby so much and am so grateful for him. We had the best wedding, It wasn’t as glamours as I imagined, but in a way that was better. It was real, and lovely and Thank God more affordable. We found people who were willing to work within our budget and were super kind. Thankfully my Mom and dad helped with other expenses too.
 
My Maid of Honor is truly one of the most wonderful people in the world! She helped me be less stressed about it and lean on her to handle so much. I can never truly repay her kindness and strength. Best of all the Bridal party was full of my closest and dearest friends/Family. And the rest of my family and friends were able to attend, only a hand full couldn’t make it. I was so blessed to see them all support us.
 
Sadly, the news goes a bit down hill here, the Honeymoon wasn’t that great, I had lots of health issues and was limited on what I could do. We did have fun and the Air BnB was lovely, but it did put a damper on the experience. My husband as awesome as he is didn’t blame me, but supported me with compassion and patience.
 
After that life tried to get back to normal with the added roommate I gained. It was weird living with him, he had already been over a lot so it was just he was staying the night and moving some stuff in. Was oddly similar and different at the same time.
 
Unfortunately, life took a downward turn when I was laid off my job. I was blessed with severance, but after working for them for about a decade I was devastated. I tried to fight it, but I became severely depressed and was hardly functional most of the time. If I managed to keep busy I was fine, I could shove the emotions deep down, but eventually I couldn’t any more and that made things really difficult. My husband as kind and understanding as he is, did his best to be there for me, but I didn’t make it easy.
 
Losing my medical coverage, and my health continually doing bad brought my anxiety to new levels. I tried to find jobs; must have sent out over 100 applications, but… physically I just didn’t qualify. It’s hard for me to stand or walk very long, or lift things and all the stuff I qualify for they have this expectation that you are physically in shape. Which sadly I’m not.
 
I wish I could say now that I’ve hit my stride and was financially in a better place, but we genuinely are struggling. Not as much as so many others hit harder during this time, but needing help from my parents who both are on limited income is difficult. I hate having to take from them, to hurt their budget and make them struggle too.
 
However, despite all this, I’m believing things will get better. I’m trying to eat healthier and smaller portions, get some kind of exercise even if it’s just laying in bed and doing stretches. Something is better than nothing after all. The hope that this season will pass and a new and better season will start is there and I refuse to let that hope die. It’s tough a lot of the time, but that’s why they call it Faith and Hope right? You have to work to keep them, they aren’t just magical warm fuzzies. Hope against Hope, Fight for your Faith and thankfully I have several dear friends, family and of course my hubby to help me remember that I am loved and not alone.
 
I’ve been thinking about to our wedding and hit with gratitude for all who helped and the decision that was made. I will never regret marrying this man that I love and I hope to prove to him the depth of that love. To encourage him like he has me, and ‘Never give him up, Never let him down.’
 
Yeah, you just got Rickrolled! XD
 
Thanks for reading!