“Promise me…not to awaken love until the time is right.”
‭‭Song of Songs‬ ‭2‬:‭7‬ ‭NLT‬‬

I am not sure why the unmarried rate for American adults is increasing, but it is. Per the U.S. census, 46.4% of adults over 18 are single.

Some of the increase is due to the epidemic of divorce, where 50% of marriages will not end like they said in their vows on their wedding day. But will end in a court of law.

Does society rush into marriage too quickly?

Yes. Because if it doesn’t work out, if the passion that sizzled starts to fizzle, when the going gets though…we bail out and search for greener pastures.

Marriage is like the Israelites roaming in the wilderness when they left Egypt. When they were tired and dissatisfied they didn’t want to follow God through the hard times. They wanted to run back into the arms of slavery and oppression.

Many marriages end in the wilderness. They end before they see their Promised Land.

As a single person, there are some marriages that I admire. But if I’m perfectly honest, the bulk of the marriages I see are not marriages I would want.

“For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her”
‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭5‬:‭25‬ ‭NLT‬‬

There are many husbands who aren’t loving their wives the way they are called to love them. To love her more than himself. To deny himself for the sake of his wife. To love even when it hurts.

Many husbands may check off that they are a good provider. But if you aren’t providing sacrificial love, then you’re aren’t fully providing.

Jesus never talked bad about the church. But I hear husbands talking bad about their wives. Don’t do that. Christ loved the church so much, despite its flawed, messed up people within, that he gave up his life for it.

Husbands, are you willing to lay your life down for your wife? What about moments after a fight? Or when you’re shopping for groceries? Or when you are at a family gathering?

Human love ebbs and flows like the ocean, but perfect love is like a constant lake. Which are you?

“For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord.”
‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭5‬:‭22‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Now wives, many of you when you read this verse may get angry when read out of context.

This is going to be difficult to write, but if a husband truly loved his wife like he was commanded, a wife shouldn’t have trouble with this verse.

If a wife felt valued more than the husband valued himself, there wouldn’t be divisiveness with this verse. If a wife was revered by her husband, if she was praised by her husband, if she was lifted up by her husband, then she would see her husband as a figure always looking out for her. Making it easier to submit.

The church submits to Jesus, because he demonstrated his love for the church.

If a wife won’t follow her husband, in most circumstances, it ultimately is the husband’s fault. Because if you dig deep enough into the mess, you will probably discover a rotting moment when the husband chose his well being and happiness over that of his wife.

That doesn’t mean the wife always gets what she wants. Because we as the church don’t always get what we want because our human nature gets us off track a lot. But we get what we need from Christ.

So, back to the beginning. We all start out this way… single. So, if you are single, don’t rush it. Don’t wake it up because your family says it’s time. Don’t wake it up because all your friends are doing it. Don’t wake it up because it’s the cultural norm.

Because drowsy people make mistakes.

Look at the drowsy marriages. Do you really want that?

No, so wait for love. For the right love. For the love that is sacrificial. The love that isn’t self pleasing. The love that is mutually beneficial.

Until that time, cling to Christ. Because His love is all that and more.

Peace