Having recently celebrated a non-milestone birthday, I can say I have finally gotten to a point where I can appreciate the gift of just having another birthday.

As a child, these days were always filled with excitement. The paper ripping, the candle blow outs, the beating of donkey pinatas and the overall feeling of being just a bit taller than the day before.

Of course, the presents were always my favorite part. Etch-a-sketch, Spyrographs and a peculiar purple-headed Frankenstein, these were childhood gifts I remember best.

As I’ve matured, I have learned the importance of presents – however the gifts I now most cherish are not physical, not even material. They are the ones that only being human can present.

As my spouse likes to say, “My presence is your present,” which I have found to be most true (although he always gets me good stuff anyway!).

I think the COVID lockdowns and emergence from those times of isolation have taught me to appreciate the gift of having loved ones in my life. When we speak or visit, I find myself now to be truly in the moment, which is something I could never really accomplish while working.

The day before my latest year-turner, I joined family members at the Orange County Fair where one of my nieces was DJing. My other niece came in tow with her husband and three small children. I can’t express the pleasure it brought me just to spend time with the kids. There is this mixture of innocence, joy and purity that only a child can bring to a situation, like an elixir of happiness.

As detailed as any tapestry, I can replay my great nephew playing peek-a-boo with the canopy of a baby stroller, his 4-year-old sister sharing her peanut butter snacks laughing, “Here have one,” and the toothless smile of the baby. Images of my mother and the rest of the family interacting with them, me and each other, form a memory of something I couldn’t possibly have appreciated when I was younger.

I do now.

We have a family group text and on my birthday, my phone blew up with the dings of happy birthday wishes. My other niece sent video clips of her twins with her prompting them for birthday wishes. The babies are just beginning to crawl and interact, and it made my heart feel so full just to see them moving about, smiling and doing the things only babies can do. Just how lucky can a person be?

One of my girlfriends took me to lunch and I was again immersed in appreciation for the unrushed, unhurried time with her joking about pretty much nothing in particular.

As I have gained so much from this newfound appreciation, I have set a goal for myself – to share the present of presence for those who are in my life, and even those who I encounter throughout my interactions, whenever possible.

I have been reading a book on Buddhism and there is a statement about how Happiness is deep mental satisfaction that arises from awareness, from wisdom.

As my niece who is a counselor says, “Let’s unpack that.”

By having an awareness that the only things holding true permanence are those that we love, and to appreciate their presence, we are helping to create a happiness within ourselves. The nice thing about this philosophy is that it can foster happiness for others as well.

So, you see the present that can only be given by presence is something we all have and can share and it is something that lasts far longer than a purple-headed Frankenstein.

And with that, I end this as “Poolside from PS.”