Style never goes out of fashion

Sorry seems to be the most useful word Standing out to fit in

Style never goes out of fashion

Or…

Being old enough to not care about trends.

Or…

If you want to look like a human, then dress like a human.

Apparently, some ways of dressing make humans look older. Think of the fashionista YouTube videos. “8 Things That Make You Look Ancient – Number 5 Will Shock You!”, or “5 Things To Stop Doing Now If You Don’t Want To Look Like A Reject From Night Of The Living Dead”.

They range from wearing flowery things, to short trousers, crocs – the list is practically endless if you were to stuff all the advice together.

Do you have any favourite style tips? Please share!

I’d like you to take a moment to think about how you’d expect your average vampire to look. What is the ideal Vampire’s appearance? Stylish? Cool? Sulky High-Schooler? Head waiter?

No, that’s most definitely not me in the above photo.

Let’s face it, the big cloak thing is so over.

(Omigosh – I’ve just noticed what they’re eating – gross!)

My approach to style – I get my clothes from charity shops or I make it. I will literally wear things until they’re falling apart. And even then, I keep wearing them. I’ve recently got into sashiko mending. The autocorrect tried to swap sashiko for sashimi – what the actual heck?

No, I am not patching my jeans with slices of salmon!

I would highly recommend you look into this beautiful Japanese style of mending. Here’s a great video to get you started.

So, apart from all these quirks, how do I pass (more or less) for human?

Years ago – decades ago, even – I came up with a little formula to help me not look odd. It was simply this – whatever one is wearing on the top then you wear the opposite on the bottom. So… tight vs. loose, long vs. short. So say for instance, you are wearing a short tight top, then a long flowing skirt or trousers would look better than short tight trousers.

Actually, it was sometime in the last century…

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I was going to create a little infogram grid to illustrate this but when I tried, my brain started hurting, so I stopped and played with the dog instead.

What are my favourite outfits? If I have to be girly, then it’s a long straight slim black skirt (practically down to my ankles) and a baggy crop top. But not too crop, if you know what I mean. Perhaps I should say short rather than crop. You see, I don’t have a six pack. I don’t really have any kind of pack, to be honest. I’m more a keg type of person. I should probably work on that.

The aim is not to be skinny, but to be strong.

My 2 ultimate outfits would be 1) black jeans, with a stripy top and a short black jacket. You see the pattern? Long+tight (jeans) plus Short+loose (jacket). 2) Short, tight (ish) skirt with a longer, looser shirt, open over a cute, French-tucked t-shirt/vest top.

There are, of course, exceptions to these rules. For example, wearing a long and loose top and bottom would normally not look very smart. Exception: on a very hot and/or sunny day, or you haven’t changed out of your pyjamas yet.

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Equally, skin tight on both top and bottom may look strange unless you’re going for a look, like rock chick (short/tight top & bottom), goth (short/long tight top & bottom) or you’re cosplaying as a lamp post or a pencil. Or you’re a 15 year-old whose parent has just said “There’s no way you’re leaving the house looking like that, young lady!” (Do people actually say that anymore?)

Similarly, there’s times when short and tight both top and bottom may be a thing – shorts and T-shirts in summer, for instance. It’s a rule, but there are exceptions, as there are with every rule. We call them exceptions because we don’t like to think we’re breaking the rules so we have exceptions instead.

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Shoes can also sort of fit in with this.

The higher the hemline, the lower the heel. Let’s leave the short tight top with short tight skirt and high high neck-breaker heels to the youngsters who are out on the pop, shall we? Or the 15 year-olds who are, as we speak, stomping back to their rooms to get changed (for now).

For anyone wanting to read all my rants in one place – including all-new exclusive stuff, then click below!

Volume 1 of my diary – why not start at the very beginning?

Volume 2 – more rants, musings and fairly useful advice

Volume 3 – things are afoot! The thot plickens…

View more on Thérésa Hedges's website »

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