At first, I felt everything.

Now, I have trouble feeling anything.

It’s like my heart shut down.

Am I going to be okay?

Is it normal to feel numb?

To say that loss is emotional is a gross understatement. The emotional upheaval is one of the first things we notice about the grief process.

We’ve said before when loss hits the heart, emotion begins to spill out everywhere. The volume and intensity of the emotions can be overwhelming.

Sometimes, however, the emotional weight can become too heavy.

The heart can’t take any more at the moment, and our “feelers” begin to shut down. We can become numb for a time.

This numbness can be for our own protection. If we were to ever feel the full weight of the intensity of our grief, it might kill us.

When an electrical circuit is overloaded, a breaker gets tripped and the flow of electricity is cut off to prevent damage. Gas stations are equipped with emergency fuel stop buttons that shut off all pumps in case of a fire or accident. In the same way, our heart’s “feelers” can shut down when overloaded. This gives our hearts and minds a grief break.

Experiencing some numbness after a loss is common. Most grievers indicate that they “shut down” at some time in their grief journey.

Some go in and out of feeling numb as time goes on.

Going numb doesn’t mean you don’t care. It doesn’t mean you didn’t love the deceased. Numbness isn’t an indication that you are insensitive, unfeeling, or that your heart has departed. Numbness is a temporary break – an emotional rest period – from the overwhelming intensity of the loss.

If you’re numb at present, rest assured your heart is still there. The emotions will return. Keep breathing deeply and accept the numbness as part of your grief process.

Loss and grief clearly teach us that things change. Life is always in flux. Now is not forever. The numbness will change too.

Affirmation:
If I go numb for a while, I’ll accept it as part of my grief.
When I’m ready, my heart will begin to feel again.

Excerpt from  The Grief Guidebook: Common Questions, Compassionate Answers, Practical Suggestions.

Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God. (Psalm 42:5)

Question: Have you experienced emotional numbness since your loss? What was that like? Feel free to share and comment below.

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