Today, before I started working on this semester’s classes, my husband and I went out for breakfast. We were enjoying our meal when I noticed a young man—late teens, maybe early 20s—come in, get his breakfast, and sit alone at a table.

About 30 minutes later, a middle-aged man walked in. He took his time getting coffee and a danish before finally sitting at the same table as the young man. I assumed right away that they were father and son.

Here’s the part that caught my attention: the man stayed on his cell phone almost the entire time. He barely acknowledged the young man. No small talk. No eye contact. Just scrolling and talking. After a while, he tossed his coffee cup, stepped outside, and continued his call.

Now, maybe I should have minded my own breakfast. But my extroverted side got the best of me. I told my husband, “I’m going to see if he’ll talk to me.”

I walked over, smiled, and asked if I could join him. I told him I was writing a book about fathers and sons, and I was curious about his interaction with the man who’d just left. Was that his father?

“Yes,” he said, and explained that his dad was on a work call. No big deal. “We’re very close.”

I thanked him for his time and returned to my table.

On the way out, my husband made a good point: “You know, he would never tell you if he was annoyed or having problems with his dad. That’s not guy language to share with a stranger.”

That stuck with me. How many moments do fathers and sons spend together without really connecting—either because one is distracted, or because neither is in the habit of speaking openly? How often does love go unspoken because “that’s just not how guys talk”?

I believe those small everyday moments matter. Even if it’s just coffee and a Danish, even if there’s no deep conversation, the choice to be present—fully present—can strengthen a bond in ways words can’t always capture.

It’s moments like these that inspired me to write my upcoming book, Fathers & Sons: Raising Boys Through Dinosaurs, Testosterone & Girls. In it, I share stories, strategies, and real-life insight to help dads not just show up—but truly connect with their sons.

If you’re a father, son, or parent who wants to build that kind of connection, I’d love for you to be part of my community. You can follow me here, or visit clynnwilliams.com to stay updated on the book release and grab free resources for your parenting journey.