Today, I feel able to let everyone know that since this the middle of May, I've begun to feel that my brain is actually working again, and I've got some energy.

My journey began with a routine mammogram on August 16, 2018. 

The lump was so small even the surgeon couldn't feel it. But it was deadly. 

I had surgery for my tiny lump in October of 2018, and in early November, I learned that it was triple negative breast cancer. Which meant chemotherapy and radiation and a few other things.

All in all, I was super tired and I had very little brain for the next two years.

Me at one of my chemotherapy sessions. 

The first week of January, 2021, before we had the vaccines and while I was trying to be being super careful, I managed to get two different strains of Covid within three months (the first was the fiery sore throat, the second just the gernal "not feeling good" kind). I got the first after getting a pelvic X-ray in a small medical clinic. I managed to stay in my bedroom and I didn't give it to anyone else

The second came from our veterinarian son who didn't know he was getting it when we had Easter dinner together, and had likely picked it up at work. Les also got it.

The two episodes left me feeling super tired and with even less brain than before. 

I was actually at an appointment with my oncologist when my blood pressure and heart rate went too high and he sent me to get an ECG and then to Emergency where I had more tests and then I was assigned to a cardiologist who sent me for even more tests. That resulted in my having to take a blood thinner and a beta blocker. Those, especially the beta blocker, just kind of snatched any energy I had left. A few months later, I had an ablation for a heart flutter on the right side of my heart, but I'm still on the medications. 

The Mayo clinic describes Cardiac ablations as a treatment for irregular heartbeats, called arrhythmias. “Cardiac ablation is most often done using thin, flexible tubes called catheters that are inserted through a blood vessel.” (Mayo Clinic)

In my case, on August 18, 2021, we went to the Newmarket hospital (Southlake) where catheters were inserted in my upper right thigh. It uses heat or cold energy to create tiny scars in the heart. The scars block faulty heart signals and restore a typical heartbeat.

I had another episode in early September, 2023 (irregular heartbeat, high BP, etc.), which led to an atrial ablation on the left side of my heart in March, 2024. 

It seemed to have worked for a time, but after two more episodes and visits to Emergency in 2024, I had another atrial ablation (this time on both sides of my heart) on New Year’s Eve, 2024. 

In between these major things, I've lost count of the number of doctor visits, ER visits, dental procedures, blood tests, stress tests, ultrasounds, minor issues (like ankle sprains), and so forth. 

If you're wondering if the radiation or the chemo or the Covid could have caused my heart problems, either one of them could have. A nurse I talked to during my last ablation voted for the radiation since my cancer lump was on the left side. But no one really knows. It might have happened even without the other things.

So, basically, I’ve been happy if I got dressed every day and went for a walk, remembered to eat and drink and take my pills and vitamins, wash and hang up my clothes, water my plants, buy birthday gifts for our grandkids, and talked to Les intelligently now and then. He's been my sole caregiver during this time.  

Mostly, I’ve read many, many books. Some new paperbacks or hardcovers I bought or got from the library, but mostly eBooks. Speaking of which, I’m so glad that I have my Kindle and our library has both Libby and Hoopla account because otherwise I couldn’t have afforded to buy all these books.

Les and I also tend to watch a few TV shows in the evenings, mostly mysteries or comedies on Acorn or Brit Box. And we’ve watched a lot of curling games, tennis, baseball, swimming, skating, and other athletic events.

I've also done puzzle after puzzle on my standing table, often while watching TV. I had a lot of 1,000 piece jigsaw puzzles, some from as far back as 40 years ago, but I’ve bought some new ones and family members have given me some. (I plan to blog about why I love jigsaw puzzles one of these days.)

I’ve tried to keep reasonably fit by walking almost every day, doing exercises that my physiotherapist recommends, and Pilates or dance (with an app called Body Groove).

One ironically good thing about my not doing much writing over the last years is that I haven’t been spending all day on the desk top computer, so my back hasn’t been bothering me nearly as much as it was. I have had some random right knee and right arm pain, though, which my physiotherapist thinks the ablations might have caused. Always something!

I’ve been doing some work in the yard, which is basically now done in English country garden style. Backyard as well as the front.

We actually started with the backyard 12 years ago and completed the front over the last few years ago. Les and our two older grandsons have done most of the digging and the planting, but I did the research and chose what plants to get and I do most of the deadheading and so forth. We have a lot of bee- and butterfly-friendly flowers. Les and I have shared in the watering. I have indoor plants as well, including a number of pots of sansevieria, all of which came from three original ones we bought a few years ago.

Front north side of our house. 

What I haven’t done since 2018 is go to a mall or any physical store or event; do any cooking or more than a little cleaning up when Les was away or when he had rotator cup surgery; and have anyone over except for occasional family members. I also haven’t taught a workshop, written anything except a short prequel to a book I wrote years ago and a few blogs, or even cared that I wasn’t doing anything. And I've drive the car maybe 5 times in those years. 

The one thing I HAVE donesince 2021 is to mentor one writer, using virtual meetings, thanks to The Writers Union of Canada, which offered grants for mentoring. the grants gave me an excuse to ask a superb writer who has several pieces in our Hot Apple Cider Books if she needed help. The plan is for her to have a book out in October and another one in February of next year. She’s pretty well the only person I’ve spoken to aside from doctors, our dentist and physiotherapist, family members, and a couple of neighbours I often meet when I’m out walking.

The “new” and good news is that in the middle of May, I started to feel a little bit like myself. In other words, I had a little energy and a little brain for a week straight. I waited a few weeks to see if it continued before I even told Les because, in the past, I’ve had energy for maybe a day or two at a time, but then it would be a week or more with no energy at all. But, right now, most days I still wake up in the morning with some energy and some brain. I really hope that’s going to continue.

I wore a Holter monitor for 2 weeks in April and again in July and they didn't show any issues. I'll do the same again in December.  Hopefully, I won’t need another ablation. I’m still on the blood thinners and beta blocker, though.

Because my brain has still been kind of sporadically here, the other thing I've done over the years is to be somewhat active on social media, mostly posting pictures (of plants!), and commenting on or reposting what other people have said. Should you want to connect there, I’m on Facebook, Instagram, Threads, Bluesky, Mastodon, and (recently) Substack as N. J. Lindquist. 

Despite my rather complicated journey, I urge every woman to get a regular mammogram. If you’re clear, you have lost nothing. And it they find something, you have a good chance of fighting it.

Should you want to read more about the cancer and heart issues in the last seven years, click on this link. https://njlindquist.com/blog/breast-cancer/

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