“Do you have the time for..” “I don’t have enough bandwidth.” “I’m so busy!”

I think every adult – and some kids – have experienced the sensation of time hunger. Needing or wanting more time to fit in the things that you have committed to do or would like to do and feeling their isn’t enough. Some people might even say they feel time starved!

That sense of time hunger, of being pressed and unable to fit everything into the day or week can deplete your resilience pretty quickly. Even one thing that takes longer than you anticipated or adds to your list can push you to frustration or overwhelm. Sound familiar?

So how can we guard against this thief of resilience and calm? Beyond talking about “better time management” which is a struggle for almost all of us, I want to offer a different way to think about this. 

When I was a kid and I’d say to my mom “I’m hungry,” she’d ask if I was hungry for vegetables. If so, then she believed I was genuinely hungry. Otherwise, she pointed out, I might like the idea of eating before dinner, or be bored or uncomfortable about something else. But if I was hungry enough to want something healthy, that was always OK. It was her way of getting me to question “hunger” as a reaction and make sure it was legit. 

We feel “busy” or pressed for time a lot, and the first step is to see if it’s really true or just a knee-jerk reaction to discomfort. Maybe you’re not time hungry, you just don’t want to do the thing you’re being asked to do next? Or maybe the issue actually fatigue. Or actual hunger! Or something else. So when you default to “I’m so busy!” in your brain, just double check that it’s true. 

Second, make sure that the things that are taking up the bulk of your time are “healthy.” By that I mean are the things taking blocks of your time actually lining up with the things that matter to you? Like taking care of yourself and your people, earning a paycheck, or making the world better? Are they adding to your wellbeing in some way or the wellbeing of people who matter to you? If not – if you’re pressed because you’ve committed your time to things that don’t match your priorities – that’s the junk food of time hunger. 

When you feel pressed for time, are you willing to stop long enough to see what might protect your resilience?  I’m curious!

All my best,

Dr. G

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