Retirement: The True Beginning
I know I've been harping on this, but bear with me. I keep finding different aspects that make me scratch my head.
Today is when I see my retirement as really beginning. Yes, my job ended the day I left the school building back in June, but right after that came summer break. I never teach in the summer, so this past summer felt like any other summer break. I even had that nagging feeling that break wasn't long enough, that I'd have to go back to work all too soon, that in August I'd have to make arrangements to make up my religious holiday absences. That nagging feeling didn't fade in the slightest.
And before the first week of school, Darwin and I went out of the country on vacation for three weeks. As a result, I wasn't home, in my natural environment, when the schools re-opened for fall. While I was in Europe, it felt like ... well, a vacation. And when I got back, I would have to go work, of course. I couldn't shake the feeling, even though I've never in my life taken three weeks off work for vacation.
Darwin and I got back on a Thursday night, and the next day neither of us was at work. Then it was Saturday and Sunday. Again, the little hamster that runs the endless wheel in my mind said that there's no way I would have gone back to work last Friday--too jet-lagged to function well. And over the weekend, there's no work, either. But Monday is a different story. Work awaits!
Then Sunday evening came.
Darwin went up to our apartment close to his job and I stayed down here in the house. It was a beautiful evening. The weather was still warm, but the leaves were starting to turn and the corn is fading from green into brown. I went out on a bike ride, partly because I love riding my bike, partly for the exercise, and partly because all too soon it'll be too miserable outside for riding.
On the ride, I checked my watch. 8:30. I didn't want to stay out too late, since I'd have to be in bed by 10, and I still wanted to--
Nope! I wasn't going to work tomorrow. Nope nope nope.
Back home, I stayed up until 10, then 11, then midnight. (When I don't have to work the next day, I usually go to bed between midnight and one.) And then I went to bed.
In the morning, I woke up at 5 out of reflex. (How long will that go on?) I got a drink of water and went back to sleep. I finally got up at 7, truly realizing that I had the entire day. I had breakfast. I started some laundry. I ran some errands. I went to the gym. I rode my bike. I was NOT at work. The cooling weather told me I should be at work. The changing leaves told me I should be at work. The day of the week told me I should be at work. And I wasn't. Nor would I be. I wasn't on vacation. I wasn't taking a sick day.
It really hit me then. It's over. My teaching career is over, and I have a pension instead of a paycheck. I'm free from work.
Today, that really begins.
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Today is when I see my retirement as really beginning. Yes, my job ended the day I left the school building back in June, but right after that came summer break. I never teach in the summer, so this past summer felt like any other summer break. I even had that nagging feeling that break wasn't long enough, that I'd have to go back to work all too soon, that in August I'd have to make arrangements to make up my religious holiday absences. That nagging feeling didn't fade in the slightest.
And before the first week of school, Darwin and I went out of the country on vacation for three weeks. As a result, I wasn't home, in my natural environment, when the schools re-opened for fall. While I was in Europe, it felt like ... well, a vacation. And when I got back, I would have to go work, of course. I couldn't shake the feeling, even though I've never in my life taken three weeks off work for vacation.
Darwin and I got back on a Thursday night, and the next day neither of us was at work. Then it was Saturday and Sunday. Again, the little hamster that runs the endless wheel in my mind said that there's no way I would have gone back to work last Friday--too jet-lagged to function well. And over the weekend, there's no work, either. But Monday is a different story. Work awaits!
Then Sunday evening came.
Darwin went up to our apartment close to his job and I stayed down here in the house. It was a beautiful evening. The weather was still warm, but the leaves were starting to turn and the corn is fading from green into brown. I went out on a bike ride, partly because I love riding my bike, partly for the exercise, and partly because all too soon it'll be too miserable outside for riding.
On the ride, I checked my watch. 8:30. I didn't want to stay out too late, since I'd have to be in bed by 10, and I still wanted to--
Nope! I wasn't going to work tomorrow. Nope nope nope.
Back home, I stayed up until 10, then 11, then midnight. (When I don't have to work the next day, I usually go to bed between midnight and one.) And then I went to bed.
In the morning, I woke up at 5 out of reflex. (How long will that go on?) I got a drink of water and went back to sleep. I finally got up at 7, truly realizing that I had the entire day. I had breakfast. I started some laundry. I ran some errands. I went to the gym. I rode my bike. I was NOT at work. The cooling weather told me I should be at work. The changing leaves told me I should be at work. The day of the week told me I should be at work. And I wasn't. Nor would I be. I wasn't on vacation. I wasn't taking a sick day.
It really hit me then. It's over. My teaching career is over, and I have a pension instead of a paycheck. I'm free from work.
Today, that really begins.
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