472 SelfWork: What To Do After You've Lost Your Shit

Anger has a place. It���s an important emotion to feel and know how to handle. It lets you know a boundary and maybe a very important boundary, value, or expectation has been ignored or crossed or threatened in a very real way. But it���s a skill then to think through what you���re going to do with that anger.

It seems that there are a lot more people these days who are angry. Maybe it���s because the immediacy that social media and texting have provided that have made it SO much easier to attack someone else online ��� or it was online at first. Maybe it���s political rhetoric that���s become more aggressive and insulting, as if that���s okay.

There's anger... and then there's losing your shit.��

But what do you do after you've lost your shit? Losing your shit is about losing control. It���s about very poor management ��� yes. But that term ��� albeit fairly colorful ��� usually means that you got way too mad about something and even you recognize that you were way out of line. Maybe it���s a pattern for you. Maybe you do it all the time. Or maybe it���s after something that suddenly happened ��� or seemed to suddenly happen��- and here comes a shit fit.

The speaker voicemail is from a man living in the UK ��� that discovered my writing about enmeshment. He describes giving so much of himself away to his parents, which then served as the pattern of his relationships with others ��� where he���s the caregiver for all ��� and feels that he has nothing left for himself. I���ll do my best to answer him!

Vital Links:

Article on enmeshment

Article on the American Counseling Associations�����website on women's anger

Anger Management Resources

Article on regret after losing your temper

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Other offerings from Dr. Margaret

You can hear more about this and many other topics by listening to my podcast,��SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford.��Subscribe��to��my website��and receive my weekly newsletter including a blog post and podcast! If you���d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click��here��and answer the membership questions! Welcome!

My book entitled��Perfectly Hidden Depression is available and you can order��here!��Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life. And it���s available in paperback, eBook or as an audiobook!

And send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. By recording, you���re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I���ll look forward to hearing from you!


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Published on November 14, 2025 05:40
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