Rest In Peace Goldie

This morning I had another parenting life lesson, my 3-year-old’s beloved goldfish Goldie died, again. He had died once before, though she didn’t know it, late one evening a few months ago.  This sent her father and I into a panic. Did we really want to have the life and death talk with her so young? The answer was a resounding no, because both of us were too cowardly to face her tears.

My husband made a mad dash to the nearest 24hr Wal-Mart to procure Goldie 2.0. The next day when our little one didn’t notice that Goldie 2.0 was slightly larger with a fancier tail the two of us were high-fiving each other for saving the day.

This morning when I noticed Goldie 2.0 being very still at the top of its bowl my breath caught in my throat. This was early morning not late at night after she was in bed. There would be no way I could surreptitiously replace Goldie 2.0 with Goldie 2.1. She was going to notice!

So I did the only thing I could do. I gathered my courage (aka – a few cups of coffee) then I called my daughter in to have a talk with her. The talk started with, “I have something to tell you,” which she already at this age knows that means something important.

Her little face grew grave as I explained that Goldie had died. I explained to her as best as I could what death meant in the context of our personal, religious beliefs and even offered to bury Goldie in the garden, (which was a big deal because the first Goldie went to septic city – she doesn’t need to know that). I ended the conversation with a hug.

With so much earnest she said to me, “I’ll miss Goldie, Mommy.”

A lump formed in my throat, and I whispered, “I know you will, Sweetie.”

Her little brows drew together. “That makes me sad, Mommy.”

I fought back the tears that sprang to my eyes. “It makes me sad too, Sweetie.”

I hug her tight again, and she gave a heavy sigh.

Then she looked at me with the serious countenance only a 3-year-old can manage with any authenticity and said, “Can we get a dog now?”

“Not today, Sweetie. Mommy has a headache.”

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