Holy flaming balls of badly written Hustler porn, Batman! I'm actually getting a blog post up on time!



THE APOCALYPSE IS NIGH.



Or, uh, I found a bit of free time. You know, one of the two.



So, this is a completely true story and it just has to be shared. Why? 'Cause I said so. For those of you who don't know, weekends are a living HELL for me. I work two jobs on the weekend, so that means I'm usually pulling 18-hour days. And then going home and trying to be a normal human being. Sometimes I even check my emails!



So, this past Saturday, I was leaving from the second job and I was crazy tired and more than a little out of it (hey, I'd only gotten one and a half hours of sleep the night before) because at this point in the day, I was running off of pure awesomeness. And sugar. And about a gallon of diet soda... But I managed to make it to my car without any problem and after slinging my stuff into the passenger seat, I climbed in and began hunting for my car charger for my phone when I suddenly realized something.



My car was a lot cleaner than usual.




I mean, I'm not going to lie to you guys. It looks like hobos are living out of my car on a GOOD day. But my car was looking pretty good tonight.



Oh. My. God. Somebody stole my car charger! And the other shit out of my car! Or at least that's what ran through my sugar-muddled head until I realized, Hey, dumbass, why would someone break into a car, take the phone car charger, but then leave the car?



And then it hit me.



This wasn't my car. Holy shit, I was in someone else's car! As you can imagine, I immediately started making a mad dash to vacate said car before the owners came back and found me sitting in it with all my work clothes and a pile of groceries chilling out in their passenger seat. How do you explain that crap? Really? Do you think they would have believed me if I'd said, "Oh, I'm sorry, I could have sworn this was my car!"



Yeah, I doubt it.



Well, thankfully, I made it out in time and managed to get a closer look at the car while I was skittering away from it quicker than a marching band in double time and it DID look exactly like my car. Same make and color. And the owner had left the car unlocked, which made me think I'd unlocked it myself when I walked up to it. But, obviously it wasn't my car. So where was my damn car?





Now, I might try to steal this car for real reals.
So shiny...

Two spaces behind me, to the left of the car I'd hopped into. I'd walked right past my own car to get up close and personal with someone else's. Go figure. So, what's the moral to this story?



I should eat more donuts on Saturdays. Yeah! If I'd had more sugar, maybe I would have been awake enough to notice my own damn car.



Save an apple. Eat a donut.



Oh, yeah, and don't steal cars for real reals. (Unless it's a really pretty one.)

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In Other News:




The Twitter release party for ADDICTED went great last week. Thanks to all those who showed up! It was a lot of fun. Want to watch an inebriated me broadcasting live on Google+ during the party? Click here!
Thanks to Black Hippie Chick and Julez S Morbius for featuring the release of ADDICTED on their respective blogs over this past week! You guys ROCK!
And thanks to everyone who reads this blog! I hit over 10k views a little while ago and it was a pretty spiffy feeling :)


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Ana Hart is a writer of erotica and romance and an Internet celebrity wannabe. She also films a crazy awesome vlog each week. The latest episode can be found HERE. Subscribers to her YouTube channel are getting cookies for Christmas. You can see the deets HERE.




Stalk Ana on TWITTER, FACEBOOK, GOODREADS, GOOGLE+, and YOUTUBE.