Rules For Writing Erotic Romance

Hello. My name is Mia Downing. I write erotic romance.

The definition of that, from Wikipedia, is:
Erotic romance novels are stories written about the development of a romantic relationship through sexual interaction.[1] The sex is an inherent part of the story, character growth, and relationship development, and couldn’t be removed without damaging the storyline.

Yep. That's exactly what I write. There are books out there that blur the rules, and some of those books have become really popular. That makes it hard for us who write to the rules, because the newbies to erotic romance expect everything to fall in line with the book they read and loved, not realizing there's a whole system to the madness, already in place.

I joke that there aren't many rules, and some of the few include don't love the dead people or pets, harm children or rape people. I'm good with all of those, because that doesn't excite me or my characters, and it's morally wrong. But did you know there are actually quite a few rules I have to follow, if I want to be published? Here is a list of the big rules.

1) Heat it up, fast!
That's a hard one, because the true readers of erotic romance (and my publisher) want the sizzle right from the get-go. I don't get 30 pages to slow-burn the lust between the characters and let them get to know each other over crumpets and tea. They want it fast, they want impact, they want a connection. That's hard, because if you have characters that are strangers to each other, you have to somehow make the attraction believable.

2) Lots o' sex!
Yep, the readers and publishers want this, too. Lots of sex, lots of details. I try very hard to show character growth, conflict, or motivation in my sex scenes so it's not just tossed in there for fun and giggles. I do a lot of dialogue and toss story line pieces into the sex, too. It's hard to write sometimes and I'll admit, sometimes I'm like, "really, who would read that?" Usually, that sex scene ends up to be the favorite one of test readers. Who figured?

In the sex, it's important to note there's a certain level of frank language that's expected. We call those 'buzz words.' So if you've read a book where the heroine might be referring to her delicate bits as 'down there' realize that's not at all par for the genre. In fact, in an erotic romance, the hero would probably demand she call her delicate bits what he calls them. Or vice versa. Do I like using buzz words? Hell no. It makes me cringe sometimes. But quite honestly, when I read books that use something flowery instead of the buzz word, I get a little cranky.

3) No 'I love you' until the end.
I never get to write the wedding scene, because in erotic romance, any romance really, once they say I love you, it's definitely over. Some authors don't even get to have characters say that, if they have a happily-for-now ending. Why? That's not what the reader/publisher wants. They want that romance formula, the chase, catch, release, suffer heartache and then resolve formula that works so well. Delving deeper, into a committed relationship or marriage, doesn't happen because usually, they say 'I love you' and the book is done. Unless they have an epilogue, or they're in a series (like my Spy Games series) you get a glimpse of what the future held for favorite characters.

This is a rule a few books break, because they go into a series that cumulates over the character's relationship. A lot of erotic romance publishers don't take serial/saga books. It will be interesting to see if guidelines change. However, from what I've seen, readers really hate that a book's conflict/romance isn't solved in a book. Hence why my series consists of stand-alone books with characters that cross-over. But each romance gets the happy ending at the end of their book.

4) Sometimes, you don't have any say in story length
It's interesting to see reviewers or readers complain about story length. Sometimes the author just doesn't have a say. If they want in on that series or anthology, an author has to come up with a story that fits the word count specified. That's really hard. I don't like to write short, and had a hard time doing so with Ripped. My Spy Games books are all full-length novels, and if they'd let me, they would have been longer. But you can only do so much sometimes.

5) Sometimes, the title and cover isn't what you wish it to be
If you want to sell sexy, your title and cover have to reflect that. I am horrible with titles, so I tend to name them after the character then brainstorm with my editor after she reads it. I know the title I pick isn't going to be sexy enough, and I've come to terms with that flaw. I also want a horse on every one of my covers, but I don't get one unless I write a Cowboy Kink. Now, I only have one book with a horse in it, but whatever. I can't complain at all about my covers--they're sexy and hot, and I love them all. But I won't deny that at times, I just want one of those tame covers with scenery and a cottage or something. A horse. If I want that, I have to go to a different genre, because that is not what sells.

So those are the rules I live with in my genre, erotic romance. Did they surprise you?

I'm also blogging over at Desiree Holt's blog so if you want a chance at free stuff, go there. But a comment here might win you something good...
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Published on September 03, 2012 08:47 Tags: erotic-romance, mia-downing
Comments Showing 1-13 of 13 (13 new)    post a comment »
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message 1: by Lynn (new)

Lynn Swayze I'm glad I'm not the only person who is horrid at titles!


message 2: by Mia (new)

Mia Downing LOL Lynn! Bad title writers, unite! I've never seemed to please my editor.

Mia.


message 3: by Susan (new)

Susan Dietz I'm just starting out writing erotica and was wondering how to engage my couple, who know each other but not that way, without making them seem like sluts. Does it have to be a fully-fledged sex scene or just an aborted one?


message 4: by Mia (new)

Mia Downing Hi Susan, by aborted do you mean a partial sex scene? Perhaps they get started and decide not to go all the way? You could do that! That's very realistic. Just make sure you motivate why they decide to stop so the reader buys into a partial scene. It's a great way to increase sexual tension, too, since the reader will be just as anxious to see them finally get the deed done.


message 5: by Susan (new)

Susan Dietz Yes, aborted in that one or the other stops things. In my storyline they have to have sex multiple times in order to stabilize something. It will take them a few times to complete the act. Also, I think sex fully clothed (well, nearly fully clothed) is sexy as well. Do you find that to be true?


message 6: by Mia (new)

Mia Downing It's all in execution. If you think it's sexy and show how involved your characters are, then your reader will be invested in the act. Good luck! It sounds like a fun book.


message 7: by Erica (new)

Erica Johns Ive learned a lot from the information on writing Erotica from a lot of other authors. Ive written an Erotic book with an African twist in it as it starts in Africa and Ive Earopeanised it because the two main characters are Africans who cross continents. Tere is a lot of explicit sex scenes which I really worked hard on. I am aware that not many Africans write Erotica and would like to open that to them.


message 8: by Casey (new)

Casey Vandell I am an aspiring writier of erotic romance. Im looking for some advice on what publishers are good and what they look for. I have sampled out several short "climaxing" short stories and have gotten the push to pursue this by friends and family. Now to just find a publisher. Any words of wisdom??
Thank you


message 9: by Renea (new)

Renea Im not stranger to writing. I normally write contemporary romance. But I am writing my first erotic romance.


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