This is a short blog but a severe one. 

Our nearby town of Palmetto, Georgia, had a police report, and confirmation, of a rape of a three-year-old girl by a 17-year-old, the son of the girl's babysitter.  Needless to say, the media was all over this story. Also, as you might imagine, vicious tweets toward the boy/man were rampant.
 
More than 15 years ago, I was invited to speak to the Planned Parenthood Council of Buffalo, New York. I thought I was going to speak about sex education, my new book, Smart Sex Stuff for Kids 7-17, and, defend my position that you need to teach young children the facts of life in a simple, straight-forward way.  I had no idea  that what they really wanted to ask me about (a writer, not a sex ed expert, as I felt they were) their local problems with older boys (older often being as young as age 9) raping younger girls, yes, say as young as age three.  Often, these were younger siblings. 
 
Now, I'm not asking you to wrap your head around that, but I am suggesting that:
    a.  In this day and time, it is long overdue for even conservative, sex education-resistant or -reluctant 
Americans, whether teachers, parents, or religious institutions, to "get over it," and realize that even young children need to know about sex.  No, not ALL about sex, but respect the young child!  Even they know they have "private parts" (or all those funny names you might use), but it isn't funny.  Help even young children learn the accurate words for their genitals.  There is no shame in this; actually, it's more shameful to have some poor kid made fun of later because they walk around talking about their peenie-weenie.  Young kids don't need a lot of info, but they do need what they need at the appropriate ages.
Unfortunately, much younger than ever, they need more awareness to speak up if someone bothers them in certain ways.
    b.  In this day and time, we should not stick our head in the sand; we are aware that such things happen, perhaps rarely?, but what difference does that make when your resistance or reluctance could leave a small child at risk?  Statistics prove that such sexual assaults occur in fairly predictable patterns:  older brother to younger sister, alas, or in this instance, an older teen to an "opportunity" victim, let's call it. Vicious emails after the fact are not nearly as effective as keeping an eye out for younger children, whoever, and wherever, they may be.  While we may never expect this in our home, in the next room, on our playground, in our group of friends, relatives, or acquaintances, we know better.  
    c.  In that day and time, back in Buffalo, I had no answers to the poor counselors and others' questions.  I still have none, but hope that they do. I do think they would sound a lot like a and b above.
 
I have to ask:
    1.  When is the last time you talked to your child about sexual matters, appropriate to their age?
    2.  When is the last time you had the urge or inkling to explain something (even the correct name of a body part or to "Let me know if you ever feel uncomfortable around Uncle Joe"), but just didn't speak up, because you felt uncomfortable?
    3.  When is the last time you checked to be sure that your schools, libraries, even religious institutions had appropriate and quality sex education materials available for children?  (After all, if they are not available in school, at home, at the local library (and not hidden behind the counter!), or in church, just where do we expect kids to find informational materials on this important subject?
 
When my sex ed book came out (the first of many that I wrote), a young mother of a young child bought a copy from me.  She sat there and read it and began to weep.  
 
"If I had had this information when I was younger, my life would have been so different," she said.  When next I looked, she had her young daughter beside her, and they were reading the book together. We can, as we say, be part of the problem or part of the solution.
 
I wrote this book about 20 years ago and there was a brief flurry of interest and acceptance because we were all in a kerfuffle over AIDS. Once we found out that AIDS mostly affected gay men (that's what we thought at that time), the curiosity died down.  However, as you well know, the sexual images, videos, music lyrics, and more, have ramped up super-significantly in the last 20 years.
 
"In this day and time" IS the time to get serious about sex education for everyone.  Otherwise, well, otherwise, we just see more heart-breaking headlines, and the answering OMG tweets that are a "sound and fury signifying nothing," instead of anything that really helps a child be educated, prepared, protected.
 
And if you just think this is only a guy-on-girl thing, you are mistaken.  Or that it can't happen to you and yours, or in your own backyard (literally, or neighborhood), you are also mistaken.
 
Sex is fascinating, funny, a fact of life, and kids (even young kids) love to learn about it, especially silly sex stuff animals and insects do. If it "takes a village" to educate children on the facts of life, our village is way too small, and often, way too late.  As the 18-year-old boy told his mother when she asked, "Can we talk about sex?"..."Sure, Mom, what do you want to know?"
 
Go to www.gallopade.com or amazon.com or your local bookstore or library and get something (not old and outdated, please!), read it, share it.
 
While you're at it, buy a second copy for someone else, such as a child, friend, teacher, librarian, or other person who works with children of all ages.
 
This is the day.  You know what to do.—Carole Marsh

 
Review By: James Cox,   Wisconsin Bookwatch: April 2008 - April 5, 2008


Just as children must become literate in reading and capable in mathematics if they are to succeed in today's complex and rapidly evolving world, so they must also become knowledgeable about matters of sex well beyond the simple rudiments of human 'plumbing'. Once the isolated province of parental responsibility, sex education for children ages seven to seventeen is now recognized as requiring the joint and cooperative participation of parents, teachers, and the children themselves. An expert and an author in the field of sex education for children, Carole Marsh has now written "Smart Sex Stuff For Kids 7-17: Practical Information & Ideas For Kids, Parents & Teachers", a compendium of information, advice, suggestions, and commentary that will prove invaluable in developing sex education curriculums, as well as parent-child discussions on this sensitive but necessary subject. The text is particularly 'reader friendly' and illustrated with cartoon-like artwork as everything from 'Recipe for a Baby', to 'Master Bation', to 'The Dating Game', to Sex Abuse/Rape, to the issues of pregnancy, abstinence, safe sex practices, love, morality and ethics. From the basic 'facts of life', to the emotional and social ramifications of being sexually active, to 'smart strategies' for boys and girls from puberty through adolescence, "Smart Sex Stuff For Kids 7-17" is an invaluable and strongly recommended resource and reference. Two other titles from Gallopade International on this topic by Carol Marsh which are also very highly recommended include: "A Period Is More Than A Punctuation Mark!: Smart Sex Stuff For Girls" and "Sperm, Squirm & Other Squiggly Stuff!: Smart Sex Stuff For Boys".