[image error] We have all heard the phrases "time will tell", or "give it time", or "time will heal it".  I know I have!  I believed it, too.  I learned early on in life to look toward the future, because life was supposed to get better over time.

This belief could not be any further from the truth.  Have you ever left a fruit out? It will rot.  Ever leave meat in the refrigerator...defrosted?  It will rot.  Have you ever waited for the sun to not come out?  It does come out, unfailingly.  Have you ever wished that winter snow didn't come?  It snows regardless, like clockwork.

The truth is that time only reveals the condition of our soul.  Time is inactive - it is passive.  Time does not do anything, nor can it do anything.  If you plant a seed, and it was good, in due time, a plant will sprout.  Otherwise, the dead seed remains dead - and decomposes.

Likewise, our injuries from way-back-when don't go away over time.  Exposed flesh has a way of decomposing, until it attracts flies, and disease, and it smells.  In the same way, our emotional, spiritual, and mental injuries break us down, cause disease, and infect other parts of our being.

When we come to Christ, all things are made new: By the Holy Spirit.  This renewal begins with calling things by their name.  In my book, Divorce Your Drama, I talk extensively about the importance of calling sin for what it is, and naming our pain and hurt accordingly.  Until we do that, we are simply pretending that time has the power to make us forget, heal, or move on.  Time can only provide the space for truth to be revealed. 

When we call things by their name, we:
* Recognize we have been wronged
Up until this point, we might have distorted the events so that life would make sense.  Instead of calling sexual abuse by its name, we might convince ourselves that it was love, or that "I provoked him", or that I am a bad girl, and that's why it all happened.  When we recognize that there is an injury, we give ourselves permission to feel the pain.  Otherwise, we might have been walking around pretending we were perfect, or being insensitive to other people's hurt - after all, time was supposed to take care of it...right?

* Recognize we have wronged others
If my bullying behavior is labeled "self-confidence" or "leadership", then why would I stop?  If being possessive and controlling is a sign of love, why would I stop trying to control you?  The key to healing begins with recognizing we are sinners, and allowing God's light to enter the dark places.  In the absence of the Holy Spirit, time will only make bad situations worse.

* Face reality
The reality of our lives is that healing requires work, over time.  The reality is that we can easily do the wrong thing in order to help ourselves avoid pain and suffering, and in the process, we can cause pain and suffering to others.  The reality is that some relationships in our lives are toxic, and we have to make some tough choices in order to move forward.  
If your own drama keeps you in destructive patterns, then nobody else but you can break yourself out of that.  

If there is one thing time does do for us, is point to eternity.  Time reminds us of the importance of cultivating eternal treasures here on Earth, of doing work worth doing, and living lives that are worth living. Don't wait for time to do for you what only you can do for yourself.

What is one thing you can work on healing today?

Bio: Francesca Escoto is an advocate for sustainable social change through emotionally healthy families and entrepreneurship.  She is a speaker, bestselling author, and startup coach. 
Francesca Escoto contact info - http://www.francescaescoto.com
Pick up the book, "Divorce Your Drama" - http://tinyurl.com/pn7b4b7

Carl Prude © 2013


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