A Modern Twist On A Classic Tale…

Once upon a time there was a great nation that had become filled with vain and selfish People whose only goal in life was to be fed and cared for and feel pleasure all the time. They made up stories about this perfect world almost every day and loved to tell them. People who didn’t like the stories were derided and pilloried endlessly and called prejudice and intolerant – the worst of crimes.

Word of this People’s selfishness spread over their kingdom and beyond. A scoundrel from a far land who had heard of the People’s vanity decided to take advantage of it. He introduced himself at the gates of the nation with a scheme in mind.

“I am a very great and brilliant thinker, and after many years of study I have invented an extraordinary method to weave a cloth so perfect that if you wear it, you will be beautiful, it will provide for all of your needs, and you will want for nothing. However, it is invisible to anyone who is too prejudiced and intolerant to recognize its perfection.”

The chief of the court heard the scoundrel’s strange story and sent for the court chamberlain. The chamberlain notified the prime minister, who ran to the People and disclosed the incredible news. The People’s selfishness got the better of them and they decided to see the scoundrel.

“Besides being invisible,” the Scoundrel told the people, “this cloth will be woven in colors and patterns created especially for each one of you.”

The People gave the scoundrel a bag of gold coins in exchange for his promise to begin working on the fabric immediately. ”Just tell us what you need to get started and we’ll give it to you.”

The scoundrel asked for a loom, silk, gold thread and then put his expert servants to work. The People thought they had spent their money quite well: in addition to getting a new extraordinary suit that would make all their dreams come true, they would discover which of their neighbors were prejudiced and intolerant. A few days later, the People called the old and wise prime minister, who was considered by everyone as a man with common sense.

“Go and see how the work is proceeding,” the People ordered, “and come back to let us know.”

The prime minister was welcomed by the scoundrel. ”I’m almost finished, but my workers need a lot more gold thread. Here, Excellency! Admire the colors, feel the softness!” The old man bent over the loom and tried to see the fabric that was not there. He felt cold sweat on his forehead.

“I can’t see anything,” he thought. “If I see nothing, that means I’m prejudice! Or, worse, intolerant!” If the prime minister admitted that he didn’t see anything, he would be discharged from his office for being a racist, or a bigot, or a homophobe as had happened to others. “What a marvelous fabric, he said then. “I’ll certainly tell the People.” The  scoundrel rubbed his hands gleefully. He had almost made it. More gold thread was requested to finish the work.

Finally, the People received the announcement that the  tailor had come to take all the measurements for their new suits. Even as they bowed, the scoundrel pretended to hold a large roll of fabric that would change their lives.

“Here is the result of my labour,” the scoundrel said. “I have worked night and day but, at last, the most beautiful fabric in the world is ready for you. And you deserve only the best. Look at the colors and feel how fine it is.” Of course the People did not see any colors and could not see any cloth at all! They panicked and felt like fainting. But luckily their sofas were right in front of their TV sets so each of them sat down. But when they realized that no one could know that each of them did not see the fabric, they felt better. Nobody could find out they were prejudice or intolerant for those were the chief of all evils. And the People didn’t know that everybody else around each of them thought and did the very same thing.

The farce continued as the scoundrel had foreseen. Once he had taken the measurements, his minions began cutting the air with scissors while sewing with their needles an invisible cloth.

The scoundrel came to the people and said, “You’ll have to take off your clothes to try on your new ones.” The scoundrel draped the new clothes on each of them and then held up a mirror. The People were embarrassed to see that they were naked but refused to say anything for fear of being branded prejudice or intolerant.

“Yes, these are beautiful clothes and they look so safe and sustaining on each of us,” the People said, trying to look comfortable. “You’ve done a fine job.” All were horrified of being called prejudice or intolerant.

The scoundrel, now a very rich man, told them, ”You are now beautiful and will feel good about yourselves, and will want for nothing. You should have a parade to celebrate your wonderful new clothes.” The People were doubtful showing themselves naked, but then they abandoned their fears. After all, no one would know about it except the prejudice and the intolerant – the worst of evils.

“All right,” they all said. “We will do this.” They summoned their carriages and put on their new clothes, and the parade was formed. Everyone wanted to know how prejudice or intolerant his or her neighbor was and, as the People passed, a strange murmur rose from the crowd.

Everyone said, loud enough for the others to hear: “Look at everyone’s new clothes. They’re beautiful! What a marvelous parade!” And though everyone was cold and embarrassed, no one said so for fear of losing their job or being ostracized.

“And the colors! The colors of that beautiful fabric! I have never seen anything like it in my life!” They all tried to conceal their disappointment at not being able to see the clothes, and since nobody was willing to admit they were prejudice or intolerant, they all behaved as the scoundrel had predicted.

A young girl, however, who wanted only to see things as her eyes showed them, went before them.

“You are all naked!” she announced. “You’ve been swindled by this scoundrel!”

“Racist!” her friends reprimanded, running after her. “Bigot! Homophobe!” They gnashed their teeth in rage and grabbed her and hauled her away. But the girls’s remark, which had been heard by everyone, was repeated over and over again until many cried:

“The girl is right! We’re all naked! We’ve been swindled!” And they put their clothes back on.

The naked fools realized that the girl was right but could not admit to that, or admit that they’d been taken. They thought it better to continue the procession under the illusion that anyone who couldn’t see their clothes was either prejudice or intolerant. They stood stiffly and hurled insults and tried to destroy any who said they were naked, or tried to clothe them.

The end.

Story: Hans Christian Anderson, Arrangement: John C. Brewer