Dyke Categories
I wrote “Dyke Categories” in 2000 for my best friend and posted it on the social site blackplanet.com. The real journey into my writing began for me there. Since then, I have received hundreds of e-mails from people all over the United States and around the world because they were touched by it. “Dyke Categories” wasn’t supposed to be taken seriously because I was mainly poking fun at black lesbians, myself included. But in every story, there seems to always be a grain of truth, and what I wrote about was the truth for a lot of lesbians.
Anyway, here is my breakdown according to “Dyke Categories,” and I’m sure you will all be able to relate to some or all of these labels. This isn’t the gospel according to Natalie Simone, but rather the gospel according to “the life.” Take it in, soak it up, and if it brings a smile to your face, I’ve done my job.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DYKE CATEGORIES
(Insert from the book Girls Just Don’t do that)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Studs/Butches
“Touch Me Not” Butch
This is usually the type of dyke who has gender identity disorder (she wants to be a man). She takes on the very dominant role in the relationship, the male role to be exact. She dresses like a man and acts like a man. There is nothing feminine about her. In fact, she is sometimes more of a man than some men are. In bed she will only want to make love to her woman using a strap-on. She will not want her woman to touch her breasts or her vagina, go down on her, or provide her with any type of pleasure because it reminds her that she is a woman. She wants to do all the pleasuring.
New Age Stud/Soft Stud
This woman also takes on the dominant role in the relationship. She, however, does not mind her woman touching her body or giving her head, etc., since she likes to be pleasured in bed by her woman. She is the dominant party in bed and is usually, if not always, on top. She will use a strap-on occasionally, but it is not necessary to the lovemaking. She just does it for added spice. She can either dress very masculine or she can sometimes be androgynous. On rare occasions (like meeting the parents for the first time or going to an important job interview), she can dress like a fem for very short periods. We lesbians will always be able to spot her, even if she’s just faking the fem role, because she cannot get rid of the walk or the talk.
Fem-Stud
This dyke is very dominant and all-boy in her thinking. She, however, has no problem rocking a short tight hairstyle that would make any fem jealous, or she might even wear her hair long. She wears boyish clothes in the streets, but occasionally she will do the fem thing. These are the type of studs that rule corporate America. She will throw on a Brooks Brothers suite like it’s nothing, but she’ll still have an unmistakable boy edge. She is so fly that even men are drawn to her charms, even though she’s obviously gay. In bed, she is similar to the New Age Stud.
Pseudo Stud, aka “The I Wish I Was Hard” Stud
This type of stud is a pretender. She dresses and acts like a stud. She is hard in the streets and around her bois and the fem women she isn’t dating. When she goes home to her fem, she drops the façade. Her woman takes control and usually dominates her in bed. She may even allow her girl to use a strap-on on her. Her woman might sometimes wonder who the fem really is in the relationship. This type of stud may also have a secret attraction to fem-studs, soft-studs, and in some cases, butches. A lot of white dykes fall into this category (you see them walking around holding hands, butch with butch), and on rare occasions, you see them in the black community. You know the type of couples where you’re constantly wondering who the daddy is? This type of stud should have her stud card revoked!!!
Fake Butch
This is usually a fem who wants to attract other fem women by dressing like a butch/stud. She will act the hard role, but her heart isn’t in it. She is only doing it to attract a fem. When a fake butch gets involved with a fem, she usually can’t keep up the pretense and eventually ”bitches out” once she feels comfortable enough in the relationship.
The Versatile Dyke, aka “The Lost Somewhere In-Between” Dyke
This type of dyke constantly keeps the masses guessing. Is she a stud? Is she a fem? Sometimes, when you see her out, she is dressed totally fem. Yet other times she does the tomboy/soft butch thing. She’s attracted to good-looking butch types, but she’s just as attracted to stunning femmes. She likes what is pleasing to her eyes. When she is with a butch, she acts the submissive part and is totally fem. She doesn’t do soft studs/New Age studs that often because they can’t keep her in check like a butch can. When she is with a fem, she takes on the dominant role and will occasionally do the soft stud thing if her woman wants it like that. In bed, she can be submissive or dominant—whatever she is called on to be. Don’t be misled by this one, however, as home girl can work a strap-on or her tongue as well as any butch/soft stud can.
FEMS
Pillow Princess
This type of woman gets involved with a “touch me not” butch. She is used to being taken care of by her butch. She is also used to being pleasured totally in bed. She will not give her woman head (either because she does not know how or never had to learn). She will treat her butch like a woman would treat a man. Their roles are old fashioned and rigid.
New Age Fem
She is all woman and very feminine. She does, however, love to play an active role in the bedroom. She enjoys pleasuring her woman and especially likes to give her head. She may get with a “touch me not stud” and be totally unhappy or get with a soft stud/New Age stud and be satisfied totally (well, for the most part). She will also mess with other fem women occasionally, for the sexual gratification and to be able to explore the fem’s body, which a butch or soft stud won’t allow. She, however, won’t be able to form a long-lasting relationship with a fem because she loves the dominance of a butch or soft stud.
Aggressive/Dominant Fem
She will dress and act totally feminine. She will, however, be totally dominant. She will only date feminine women and will usually take on the dominant role in sex. This type will occasionally do the fake-butch thing.
True Bisexual
This is a woman who can form meaningful relationships with both sexes. When she’s with a woman, she is with her only and fits totally into the gay world with no problem. When she’s with a man, she fits totally into the straight world and totally loves him. She isn’t confused. She just falls in love with a person, not a gender. She usually prefers sex with women but some can enjoy both equally. She is usually attracted to the soft stud/tomboy types, but may have a lot of problems in the relationship because of the stud’s fear that she isn’t true to the game and will eventually go back to men. Sexually, she is usually very aggressive in bed.
Fake Bisexual
This is the type of woman who most of us real lesbians run from. She is not really bi-sexual—she is just having sex with women for the “freak factor.” In other words, she is just freaky in bed and that is all it is to her with women—just being freaky. She will usually have a boyfriend and wants him to join in the fun, or she’s doing it to fulfill his fantasy. Sometimes, though, if her man is cool with it, she will have sex one-on-one with a woman. This is the type of aggravating woman who hits you up on social media sites asking for a threesome with you, or has a personal ad on craigslist that states, “I already have a man, just looking for a feminine female friend for fun.” A lot of the time they’re just having sex with women to please their man. Some may actually like sex with women, but they all prefer men, hands down. They will only get down with other fem women because this is the only type their man will allow in the bedroom. Also, they’re just doing it for the sex, so they want a woman that looks and acts like them. They will usually date other fake bisexual women, or luck up and get with a bi-curious woman, and will turn her on or off to sex with women.
Bi-curious
A bi-curious woman is curious about being with another woman sexually. Maybe it’s because she’s tired of men or maybe it’s because she finds the idea of being with a woman fascinating because the media hypes it so much. Maybe she watched a lesbian flick and it turned her on a little and she wants to experience the real deal. She is usually dating a man or she is between relationships but finding herself attracted to women. Usually, one of two things happens. She tries it and loves it and becomes gay or bi-sexual (more become gay), or she never has the balls to try it and remains curious for the rest of her life. Some bi-curious women fall into the fake bi-sexual category (or so they want their man to believe). This is just a way for them to get in with women without their man feeling threatened, especially if they share the fantasy with him. Sometimes these bi-curious, now fake bisexuals become real gay after the experience. Either way, I should warn the bi-curious that lesbian sex is nothing to play with. It is rarely just about the sex with women. It is very emotional, and the love and the lovin’ are on a whole different level. Ask the millions of bi-curious women who tried it and loved it and can’t—or won’t— go back to men. This is not for the weak minded because the wrong woman can drive you crazy and a woman’s touch is as addictive as crack cocaine.
Thanks again for allowing me to share and until we meet again, remember that girls do do that—only better!!!!
Anyway, here is my breakdown according to “Dyke Categories,” and I’m sure you will all be able to relate to some or all of these labels. This isn’t the gospel according to Natalie Simone, but rather the gospel according to “the life.” Take it in, soak it up, and if it brings a smile to your face, I’ve done my job.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DYKE CATEGORIES
(Insert from the book Girls Just Don’t do that)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Studs/Butches
“Touch Me Not” Butch
This is usually the type of dyke who has gender identity disorder (she wants to be a man). She takes on the very dominant role in the relationship, the male role to be exact. She dresses like a man and acts like a man. There is nothing feminine about her. In fact, she is sometimes more of a man than some men are. In bed she will only want to make love to her woman using a strap-on. She will not want her woman to touch her breasts or her vagina, go down on her, or provide her with any type of pleasure because it reminds her that she is a woman. She wants to do all the pleasuring.
New Age Stud/Soft Stud
This woman also takes on the dominant role in the relationship. She, however, does not mind her woman touching her body or giving her head, etc., since she likes to be pleasured in bed by her woman. She is the dominant party in bed and is usually, if not always, on top. She will use a strap-on occasionally, but it is not necessary to the lovemaking. She just does it for added spice. She can either dress very masculine or she can sometimes be androgynous. On rare occasions (like meeting the parents for the first time or going to an important job interview), she can dress like a fem for very short periods. We lesbians will always be able to spot her, even if she’s just faking the fem role, because she cannot get rid of the walk or the talk.
Fem-Stud
This dyke is very dominant and all-boy in her thinking. She, however, has no problem rocking a short tight hairstyle that would make any fem jealous, or she might even wear her hair long. She wears boyish clothes in the streets, but occasionally she will do the fem thing. These are the type of studs that rule corporate America. She will throw on a Brooks Brothers suite like it’s nothing, but she’ll still have an unmistakable boy edge. She is so fly that even men are drawn to her charms, even though she’s obviously gay. In bed, she is similar to the New Age Stud.
Pseudo Stud, aka “The I Wish I Was Hard” Stud
This type of stud is a pretender. She dresses and acts like a stud. She is hard in the streets and around her bois and the fem women she isn’t dating. When she goes home to her fem, she drops the façade. Her woman takes control and usually dominates her in bed. She may even allow her girl to use a strap-on on her. Her woman might sometimes wonder who the fem really is in the relationship. This type of stud may also have a secret attraction to fem-studs, soft-studs, and in some cases, butches. A lot of white dykes fall into this category (you see them walking around holding hands, butch with butch), and on rare occasions, you see them in the black community. You know the type of couples where you’re constantly wondering who the daddy is? This type of stud should have her stud card revoked!!!
Fake Butch
This is usually a fem who wants to attract other fem women by dressing like a butch/stud. She will act the hard role, but her heart isn’t in it. She is only doing it to attract a fem. When a fake butch gets involved with a fem, she usually can’t keep up the pretense and eventually ”bitches out” once she feels comfortable enough in the relationship.
The Versatile Dyke, aka “The Lost Somewhere In-Between” Dyke
This type of dyke constantly keeps the masses guessing. Is she a stud? Is she a fem? Sometimes, when you see her out, she is dressed totally fem. Yet other times she does the tomboy/soft butch thing. She’s attracted to good-looking butch types, but she’s just as attracted to stunning femmes. She likes what is pleasing to her eyes. When she is with a butch, she acts the submissive part and is totally fem. She doesn’t do soft studs/New Age studs that often because they can’t keep her in check like a butch can. When she is with a fem, she takes on the dominant role and will occasionally do the soft stud thing if her woman wants it like that. In bed, she can be submissive or dominant—whatever she is called on to be. Don’t be misled by this one, however, as home girl can work a strap-on or her tongue as well as any butch/soft stud can.
FEMS
Pillow Princess
This type of woman gets involved with a “touch me not” butch. She is used to being taken care of by her butch. She is also used to being pleasured totally in bed. She will not give her woman head (either because she does not know how or never had to learn). She will treat her butch like a woman would treat a man. Their roles are old fashioned and rigid.
New Age Fem
She is all woman and very feminine. She does, however, love to play an active role in the bedroom. She enjoys pleasuring her woman and especially likes to give her head. She may get with a “touch me not stud” and be totally unhappy or get with a soft stud/New Age stud and be satisfied totally (well, for the most part). She will also mess with other fem women occasionally, for the sexual gratification and to be able to explore the fem’s body, which a butch or soft stud won’t allow. She, however, won’t be able to form a long-lasting relationship with a fem because she loves the dominance of a butch or soft stud.
Aggressive/Dominant Fem
She will dress and act totally feminine. She will, however, be totally dominant. She will only date feminine women and will usually take on the dominant role in sex. This type will occasionally do the fake-butch thing.
True Bisexual
This is a woman who can form meaningful relationships with both sexes. When she’s with a woman, she is with her only and fits totally into the gay world with no problem. When she’s with a man, she fits totally into the straight world and totally loves him. She isn’t confused. She just falls in love with a person, not a gender. She usually prefers sex with women but some can enjoy both equally. She is usually attracted to the soft stud/tomboy types, but may have a lot of problems in the relationship because of the stud’s fear that she isn’t true to the game and will eventually go back to men. Sexually, she is usually very aggressive in bed.
Fake Bisexual
This is the type of woman who most of us real lesbians run from. She is not really bi-sexual—she is just having sex with women for the “freak factor.” In other words, she is just freaky in bed and that is all it is to her with women—just being freaky. She will usually have a boyfriend and wants him to join in the fun, or she’s doing it to fulfill his fantasy. Sometimes, though, if her man is cool with it, she will have sex one-on-one with a woman. This is the type of aggravating woman who hits you up on social media sites asking for a threesome with you, or has a personal ad on craigslist that states, “I already have a man, just looking for a feminine female friend for fun.” A lot of the time they’re just having sex with women to please their man. Some may actually like sex with women, but they all prefer men, hands down. They will only get down with other fem women because this is the only type their man will allow in the bedroom. Also, they’re just doing it for the sex, so they want a woman that looks and acts like them. They will usually date other fake bisexual women, or luck up and get with a bi-curious woman, and will turn her on or off to sex with women.
Bi-curious
A bi-curious woman is curious about being with another woman sexually. Maybe it’s because she’s tired of men or maybe it’s because she finds the idea of being with a woman fascinating because the media hypes it so much. Maybe she watched a lesbian flick and it turned her on a little and she wants to experience the real deal. She is usually dating a man or she is between relationships but finding herself attracted to women. Usually, one of two things happens. She tries it and loves it and becomes gay or bi-sexual (more become gay), or she never has the balls to try it and remains curious for the rest of her life. Some bi-curious women fall into the fake bi-sexual category (or so they want their man to believe). This is just a way for them to get in with women without their man feeling threatened, especially if they share the fantasy with him. Sometimes these bi-curious, now fake bisexuals become real gay after the experience. Either way, I should warn the bi-curious that lesbian sex is nothing to play with. It is rarely just about the sex with women. It is very emotional, and the love and the lovin’ are on a whole different level. Ask the millions of bi-curious women who tried it and loved it and can’t—or won’t— go back to men. This is not for the weak minded because the wrong woman can drive you crazy and a woman’s touch is as addictive as crack cocaine.
Thanks again for allowing me to share and until we meet again, remember that girls do do that—only better!!!!
No comments have been added yet.
