Distance and focalization in narrative.

I am going to sound a bit more didactic in this post, because what I am about to share with you I learned in my Creative Writing Theories 408, 412 and 409 class. What does this mean? The following includes senior college level creative writing tips that are taught by professors in a university. So in the following article, I intend to teach you some of the theory behind Creative Writing. What I am about to say is not a matter of opinion–it is a matter of instruction and advanced writing methodology. If you can understand and implement the advice given in this article, it will greatly impact your writing. Enjoy!

Narration: Not What it Seems on the Surface

When we write, we often “jump in” to the story. Whether or not we make a plot first, there always comes that tried and true moment when we put our hands to the keyboard and begin.

Often when we write, we see the narrator and the main character as one person. We might also see the author and the narrator as one person. But in the wide scheme of things, this becomes a very limiting mindset if you want to take your writing to the next level. Your main character is not your narrator. Also, you are not the narrator of your own book. So I ask the question–who (or what) is your narrator?

In this case, the question of first, third, or second-person narration becomes obsolete. For the purpose of this article, we do not care which “tense” you use for your story. Because narration, no matter from whose perspective you are writing, is its own entity in the story.

Yes, even in first person.

The Narrating Agent

Let’s take a step back.

We’re used to hearing such terms as “scene”, “main character” and “voice”, aren’t we?

I’d like to introduce you to a new triad: the focalized, the focalizer, and the focalizing agent. The “focalizing” agent is also known as the “narrating” agent and I will use the terms interchangeably in this article.

Reading tip: Don’t be scared of the word “focalized.” It is used quite intentionally. Just as a camera focuses on the events of a movie, your narrating agent (or “focalizing agent”) is the “lens” of your story.

Imagine you hold a camera in your hands. The story is playing out in front of you like a movie. You see your main character and the scene in front of you. But don’t forget the lens of the camera. The lens of the camera is your focalizing agent (narrator.)

The Focalizer

Your “Focalizer” is the main character through which we see the story. In many cases, such as third-person writing, the focalizer changes depending on which character we are using. In first person, the focalizer usually remains the same, unless you are writing first-person from many different character perspectives. Your focalizer (main character) has traits of its own. It has humor (or lack thereof), it is male or female, it has a history, a past, a present, and a future. But the focalizer remains separate from the focalizing agent. Your main character is not your narrating voice.

The Focalized

The focalized is the scene you are portraying in your book. The focalized can also be certain aspects of a scene: the description of a vase, the traits of a house, a frantic chase, the wind, etc. The focalizing agent narrates about how the focalizer (main character) interacts with the focalized (scene, object, instance.)

Brief Recap

Narrating (focalizing) agent: your narrator, the “camera” for your story.

Focalizer: your main character for a particular scene.

Focalized: the scene itself, or objects within that scene.

The Traits of Your Narrating Agent

Your narrating agent has traits separate from your main character or specific scene. Your narrating agent even has traits separate from you, the author. Although your narrating agent should have its own distinct “characteristics,” it is not usually a character in the story, unless you are writing first person (with a few other exceptions.) The narrating agent is rather a removed presence in “story space.” It is in the invisible storyteller who exists outside the story, above the story, etc. It is the lens through which we see your main character and events.

Let’s look at some examples of different narrating agents, shall we?

Narrating Agent #1 is very close to the story. The “lens” of the narrating (focalizing) agent is “up close.” In the following example, the camera is right in front of the main character. We are seeing every intimate detail of her experience inside the story. Psychologically, the reader feels like they are “inside the main character’s head.” But they are not. They are simply seeing the story from a very close-up narrating agent.

Her mouth quirked. She didn’t like libraries. The silent tension of a thousand books made her nervous. Her hands shook as she put down her garden magazine. The man across from her leaned in close, an invitation in his eyes. She found it very hard to whisper, “Shall we continue this outside?”

Narrating Agent #2 is a bit more removed. We still know what the main character is thinking and feeling, but now we get an idea of the nature of the library, other elements of the scene, what’s happening in the background, etc. The reader feels like they are sitting at a table next to the main character, watching the story take place like a curious eavesdropper.

The girl looked uncomfortable sitting at the table. She kept fidgeting in her seat and drawing the attention of the head librarian, a grumpy sort who found unnecessary movement disruptive in her library. The man across from her seemed amused by her discomfort and nodded to the door, offering her a way out. The girl’s whisper filled up the reading room like a cold draft: “Shall we continue this outside?”

Narrating Agent #3 is even more removed from the scene. Here, we can feel the “lens” of the camera panning around, giving us a history of the building, insight into the environment, all of which effects the reactions of the main character. The reader feels like they just walked into the library and they are gazing from the doorway at the events inside.

The Old Town Library was a wretched place full of dust and tattered pages. An ancient building, it housed books from over a hundred years ago, thumbed and stained by countless grubby hands. The reading room held a certain weight to it, a slight pressure on the shoulders which could drive a man insane given enough time. All of this added to the girl’s anxiety. After the man approached her table, the girl’s desperate whisper riffled through the silent room: “Shall we continue this outside?”

As you can see, adjusting the lens of the narrating agent can greatly change the reader’s experience of your story.

The Distance of Your Narrating Agent is Not Set in Stone

Now it’s time to really have fun. Now that we know the focalizing agent (narrator) is a camera, we know we can use it as a tool to enhance our writing. The focalizing agent does not need to remain set in stone–though it’s a fun challenge to write a short story where the focalizing agent IS set in stone, a certain distance away from the events in the text.

The point of all this is to become aware of your narrating agent and use it to your advantage. When you are writing or editing a certain scene, consider: when do I want my narrating agent to be “up close,” and when do I want it to pull back? When do I want to bring the camera into focus, and when do I want to zoom out, catching details of the world and history? When do I want to see inside the character’s mind, and when do I want to bring the environment to life?

Characteristics of Your Narrating Agency Should Remain Consistent

Do you want your narrating agent to be ironic or funny? Do you want your narrating agent to interrupt at odd intervals to offer more information about a certain person, a certain place, or a history? Do you want your narrating agent to be poetic and haunting, or fast and furious–young like a teenager, or old like a grandmother?

Consider these questions as you write. The more you are able to separate your narrating agent from your main character and the events in the story, the more control you have over your writing voice. As you change the traits of your narrating agent, you will see the pace of the story change, the quality of descriptions (or lack thereof), and how the setting of a scene can effect the main character (how the focalized can influence your focalizer, and vice versa.) This is great! It’s all connected and controlling your narrating agent allows you to easily adjust the voice of your story. Change your mindset about narration, and watch your writing grow before your eyes!

Flex Your Writing Muscle: Exercises Using Narrating Agents

Test your new knowledge with these simple exercises taken from my Creative Writing workshops.

Exercise #1: Write a scene from 3 different “distances.”

Your scene: your male main character just got into a fist-fight with his father in front of a bar. (500-750 words)

-The first scene should be “up close,” an intimate conversation or a blow-by-blow account of the event.

-The next scene should be written from farther away–pretend you are sitting across the street from the main action and write the scene as you see from across the street.

-Your third scene should be very far removed, as though you are reading it in a newspaper or hearing about it long after the fact. Imagine your narrator is recounting a story it heard from a friend.

Exercise #2: Narrate outside your comfort zone. (500-750 words)

-Pretend your narrator is not human. For this exercise, your narrator is a house. Describe the events in the upper bedroom. Describe the same event as though it happened last night, last year, and 50 years ago.

Exercise #3: Give your narrating agent some personality. (500 words)

-Your narrating agent is extremely grumpy. Describe your main character having coffee with a friend.

-Your narrating agent is very educated. Describe your main character getting lost in a very strange part of town.

-Your narrating agent is humorous and lighthearted. Describe a bus going over a bridge into a river.

The point of these exercises is to help the writer develop their voice and understand how to use the narrator to bring depth and focus to their work.

Brief Recap

-Your narrator is not your main character. It is also not the author.

-Your narrating (focalizing) agent is like a lens through which we see the story

-Your narrating (focalizing) agent can be close to the text or very far away.

-Your narrating agent can change its focus throughout a story, pulling in close or panning the environment. (Careful with this, as you want to keep somewhat consistent throughout your story.)

-Your narrating agent doesn’t have to be human. It can have characteristics, but it is not a fully developed character in that sense.

-Your narrating agent exists solely in “story space” and controls how the reader perceives the text.

Last of all, have fun! Experiment! Enjoy!

Free mini workshop: Feel free to post your Narrating Agent Exercises in a comment below and we can discuss your writing!