Confession: I skipped the iPhone 5 and 5s. Instead, I kept one dependable and attractive iPhone 4s for three freaking years.

As you can imagine, I was expecting the iPhone 6 do more than just eliminate the shame of typing in an unlock code like a Neanderthal. I was ready to step into the present—nay, hoverboard-be-damned, the FUTURE!

Unfortunately, the essence of the iPhone 6 is meh. It’s boring. There’s nothing about it that makes you say, “WOW! THAT IS NEW AND AWESOME!” The reason why the iPh...