I’ve been a mother of a boy for six years now and I’ve noticed a few things while raising my little man – I wonder if other mothers of boys have noticed the same things …

– Boys will describe every single bowel movement they ever do. ���I did three little ones and a medium sized one.��� ���It looks like a horse shoe.��� And so on.

– Boys don���t walk. They gallop, run, dance, skip, twizzle, stop, go. Even holding a boy���s hand gets exhausting.

– Everything is treasure. Stones, feathers, shiny objects, sticks and particularly other people���s rubbish.

– Their hands spontaneously form fists; it isn���t necessarily that they like to fight, so much as that their bodies have a physical reaction to every emotion.

– If my boy is grumpy it���s because he needs food or exercise. Period.

– Boys are very impressed by older boys.

– Boys are always covered in cuts, scrapes and bruises. If you���re going somewhere special, that���s when he���ll go flying and end up with a) a black eye b) ripped trousers or c) a gruesome looking cut.

– Boys grow at a ridiculous speed. Just when you think you���ve got them sorted for the winter, you realise that they grew out of everything a week ago.

– Boys choose clothes for comfort. They don���t care what they look like. If it���s soft they���ll wear it, if it isn���t they won���t.

– But given a choice, boys like to be naked. They just do. It probably gives them easier access to ���

– Their penises. Boys love them. It���s their first toy, a source of endless fascination and comfort. He will hold it when going to sleep at night and play with it when watching the television. It���s normal. Apparently.

– Boys eat snot and, when challenged, claim it���s delicious. That���s normal too. Apparently.

– Boys can be quick to anger, but are also swift in getting over it. They can���t understand why their sister is still cross with them an hour after they upset her.

– Talking of which, boys wind up their siblings by stealing and hiding their stuff. The more precious the object, the funnier they find it. They don���t understand why this upsets people.

– Boys have endless energy. They don���t slow down from the moment they wake till the moment their head hits the pillow at night.

– Boys love, deeply, intensely and expressively. They will hug you, pull you in for a spontaneous kiss, curl up on you on the sofa like dogs and tell you how much they love you.

While writing this I realised how much my little boy makes me smile.

I’m so glad that the book I just wrote has a teenaged boy as the Main Character, because while I’m not sure if Riley will enjoy Angel’s Fury or The Weight of Souls in a few years, I know the little guy whose favourite book for ages was Captain Flinn and the Pirate Dinosaurs, will really love Toby and his ship, The Phoenix.