FIRST: We are already selling out of the first print run. This happened with A Dog's Purpose too, and it means there won't be that many first editions out there. A first edition copy of The Hobbit sold for $ 210,000. Only a pre-order will guarantee a first edition. The Dog Master is exactly like The Hobbit except for plot and character. And, well, setting. But I used some of the same words! So pre-order The Dog Master and you'll be able to sell it for thousands of dollars and if not I will send you a sticker.

SECOND: Pre-orders, whether through the chains or indie book stores, send a signal up and down the nervous system of the publishing world. (And believe me, their system is VERY nervous.) It says they need to have lots of copies in stock because on August 4th people are going to pour through the doors, screaming and sobbing, drinking too many caffeinated beverages, stepping on each other to grab a copy of The Dog Master. They will order in more stock, which will deplete the first print run, which will make your copy worth thousands or you will get a sticker! In other words, it is really good for me. That's kind of the bottom line here.

THIRD: I need to get back to you on the third reason because I kind of forgot it.

FOURTH: Think of the convenience! Instead of being stepped on by the cappuccino drinkers, your copy will be waiting at the counter, given to you by a person who will turn out to be your long-lost aunt who will leave you hundreds of thousands of dollars in her will! This could happen even if it undeniably won't. Or if you order it on-line, it will arrive via a coachman wearing white gloves, who will hand it over on bended knee. Or, if you live in New York, it will be a bike messenger with a head wound. And if you order it electronically, it will appear as if by Hobbit-like magic on your device, along with a check from your aunt for hundreds of thousands of dollars! Or at the very least when she dies she'll leave you a sticker.

What are we on, FIFTH? Okay, here's how to pre-order. A LOT of indie bookstores allow you to order on their web sites. Just look for their site, there's usually a search function on their home page, type in The Dog Master, and follow the instructions. You of course know how to do this with Amazon and the chains. You can always ask in person at the customer service counter or the front counter. You can call the store, too.

SIXTH: I was told today if you reach for the nearest book to you and read the first line from page 45 it will explain your love life. I did this with The Dog Master and it says, "She pulled her clothing together and waited, feeling sick at heart." YES! This is EXACTLY RIGHT. So try this scientific method yourself and see how you do.

SEVENTH: I have to have a seventh so I can call this "8 Simple Reasons to Pre-Order The Dog Master."

EIGHTH: I would consider it a real favor. I promise you this is a worthwhile read, a great book, even. It's my favorite that I've ever written and those who have had an opportunity from my publisher to sneak a peek all agree it's my best. Pre-orders are so important to what I do for a living, if you think you'd read The Dog Master would you consider ordering it ahead of the publication date? -- Bruce, author of 8 Simple Reasons to Pre-Order The Dog Master."