As unpublished writers, we always hear about the editing process and how draining it can be. We nod our heads sympathetically and think we get it.

Then we get our first book deal. Our first edit letter on our first past.

Then we realize, "Wow... this is different than what I expected."


At least that's how I feel.

I thought I was unbelievably prepared for my edit letter. And while I wasn't like John Green, who wrote an article about sobbing hysterically for four days after each edit letter, it got to me. Not because I thought I was worthless, no. Not that at all.

It got to me because I wasn't sure whether I'd be able to meet expectations.

At Goddard College, we had a saying, "Trust the process." That was really hard to do. I took an extra semester. I wish I took an extra two. But I finished.


With only two weeks, one hour, and fifty-five minutes until deadline, I've been attempting to outline, pestering my amazingly patient editor, and having "WOE IS ME" moments where I curse my brain for not being able to think things through and sucking at outlines.

But something started to click. Not just with that, but with the books I made myself read, knowing I was reading for educational purposes rather than solid pleasure.

(Just so you know, it's a REALLY difficult transition to go from very experimental literary fiction to YA).


So... I'm frazzled, which is natural.

But I'm also ending up with a really good book, one that I honestly can't wait to share with everyone.


And, on that note, I should probably try to sleep. Tomorrow's a big day:
1. Ride horses
2. Get plane tickets to Australia to visit my boyfriend for TWO MONTHS! AHHHH! :)
3. Revisions for my novel
4. Drive back to my apartment