Angela > Angela's Quotes

“If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?”
― Steven Wright

“If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?”
― Steven Wright

“I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time" so I ordered French toast during the Renaissance.”
― Steven Wright

“The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I wondered, 'Where the hell is my roof?”
― Steven Wright

“I put tape on the mirrors in my house so I don't accidentally walk through into another dimension.”
― Steven Wright

“Why isn’t the word “phonetically” spelled with an “f”?”
― Steven Wright

“Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.”
― Steven Wright

“Last week the candle factory burned down. Everyone just stood around and sang, 'Happy Birthday.”
― Steven Wright

“Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.”
― Steven Wright

“I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.”
― Steven Wright

“Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.”
― Steven Wright

“If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?”
― Steven Wright

“If a mute kid swears, should his mother wash his hands with soap?”
― Steven Wright

“I named my dog Stay, so I can say, 'Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!”
― Steven Wright

“I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, 'Where’s the self-help section?' She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.”
― Steven Wright

“Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.”
― Steven Wright

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.”
― Martin Luther King Jr., A Testament of Hope: The Essential Writings and Speeches

“Those who are not looking for happiness are the most likely to find it, because those who are searching forget that the surest way to be happy is to seek happiness for others.”
― Martin Luther King Jr.

“Forgiveness is not an occasional act, it is a constant attitude.”
― Martin Luther King Jr.

“If a man is called to be a street sweeper, he should sweep streets even as a Michaelangelo painted, or Beethoven composed music or Shakespeare wrote poetry. He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and earth will pause to say, 'Here lived a great street sweeper who did his job well.”
― Martin Luther King Jr.

“We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope.”
― Martin Luther King Jr.

“I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.”
― Martin Luther King Jr.

“Science investigates; religion interprets. Science gives man knowledge, which is power; religion gives man wisdom, which is control. Science deals mainly with facts; religion deals mainly with values. The two are not rivals.”
― Martin Luther King, Jr

“Beautiful things don't ask for attention.”
― James Thurber, The Secret Life of Walter Mitty

“The principle here is that a new generation owes a measure of thanks to every member of the previous generation. Our elders planted fields and fought in wars; they advanced the arts and sciences, and generally made sacrifices on our behalf. So by their efforts, however humble, they have earned a measure of our gratitude and respect.”
― Amor Towles, A Gentleman in Moscow

“Here, indeed, was a formidable sentence--one that was on intimate terms with a comma, and that held the period in healthy disregard.”
― Amor Towles, A Gentleman in Moscow

“For his part, the Count had opted for the life of the purposefully unrushed. Not only was he disinclined to race toward some appointed hour - disdaining even to wear a watch - he took the greatest satisfaction when assuring a friend that a worldly matter could wait in favor of a leisurely lunch or stroll along the embankment. After all, did not wine improve with age? Was it not the passage of years that gave a piece of furniture its delightful patina? When all was said and done, the endeavors that most modern men saw as urgent (such as appointments with bankers and the catching of trains), probably could have waited, while those they deemed frivolous (such as cups of tea and friendly chats) had deserved their immediate attention.”
― Amor Towles, A Gentleman in Moscow

“On those we love:
"Every year that passed, it seemed a little more of her had slipped away; and I began to fear that one day I would come to forget her altogether. But the truth is: No matter how much time passes, those we have loved never slip away from us entirely.”
― Amor Towles, A Gentleman in Moscow

“For what matters in life is not whether we receive a round of applause; what matters is whether we have the courage to venture forth despite the uncertainty of acclaim.”
― Amor Towles, A Gentleman in Moscow

“To what end, he wondered, had the Divine created the stars in heaven to fill a man with feelings of inspiration one day and insignificance the next?”
― Amor Towles, A Gentleman in Moscow