Megan > Megan's Quotes

“That's why I want you there, he said. You're unpredictable, and that can be the difference between success and failure. Most people make decisions in anger, fear, love, or obligation. You make decisions to irritate people.”
― Kim Harrison, For a Few Demons More

“Hey, ah, does anyone want a cookie or something? Oh yeah. A cookie. That would make everything better. Dunked in a shot of tequila , maybe? Or better yet, just the bottle? Yeah, that ought to do it.”
― Kim Harrison, Every Which Way But Dead

“Plan B?' Ivy said. 'What is plan B?'
Jenks reddened. 'Grab the fish and run like hell,' he muttered, and I almost giggled.”
― Kim Harrison, A Fistful of Charms

“What are you?" I rasped.
It smiled. "Whatever scares you.”
― Kim Harrison, Dead Witch Walking

“I told you, computers are like women. If you shout at them or ask them to do too many things at once, they shut down and you won't even get a sniff”
― Kim Harrison, The Good, the Bad, and the Undead

“Oh for the sweet humpin' love of Tink! ~ Jenks”
― Kim Harrison, The Outlaw Demon Wails

“Tink's Panties!”
― Kim Harrison

“Most of the upper management of I.S. were undead. I always thought it was because the job was easier if you didn't have a soul.”
― Kim Harrison, Dead Witch Walking

“The mistakes don't matter. It's what you do when you mess up that does.”
― Kim Harrison, Early to Death, Early to Rise

“You try getting through the Hollows traffic with a stoned redhead hanging out the window shouting, 'I'm king of the world!' ~Lee”
― Kim Harrison, Black Magic Sanction

“Face it, you stupid little cookie maker,” Jenks said, almost sounding fond, “in the last couple of days you’ve seen what it’s like to be in a family, with all the touchy tempers and irritation that goes on. Now you get to see the other side, where we do stupid stuff for each other just because we like you. Rache is the little sister. Ivy’s the big sister. I’m the uncle from out of state, and you’re the rich nephew no one likes but we put up with you anyway because we feel sorry for you. Just let me help, huh? It won’t kill you.”
― Kim Harrison, Pale Demon

“By Tink's diaphram...!”
― Kim Harrison

“Join us next time for Days of the Undead when Rachel learns her long lost brother is really a crown prince from outer space.”
― Kim Harrison, Every Which Way But Dead

“Tink's a Disneyland whore!"-Jenks”
― Kim Harrison

“As the joke goes, you don’t have to be faster than the wolf chasing you, just faster than everyone else running away.”
― Kim Harrison, A Fistful of Charms

“Tagged by a whiny little vamp. Rache, take this sword and stick it in me. Just go and stick it in me. I'm a back-drafted, crumpled-winged, dust-caked, dew-assed excuse of a backup. Worthless as a pixy condom. Taken down by my own partner. Just tape my ass shut and let me fart out my mouth.”
― Kim Harrison, A Fistful of Charms

“Ivy!' I stammered, then glared at Kisten. 'You told Ivy? Thanks a hell of a lot. Want to call my mom next?”
― Kim Harrison, Every Which Way But Dead

“Ivy turned. 'He bit you on the neck?' she said, deadpan serious but for her eyes. 'Oh, then it's got to be love. She won't let me bite her neck.”
― Kim Harrison, Dead Witch Walking

“But a slow, deeply satisfied smile came over him, and his breath quickened. 'So softly it starts,' he whispered. 'Foolishly clever and with an unsurvivable trust. It just saved your miserable life, that questionable show of thought, my itchy-witch.' Al’s smile shifted, becoming lighter. 'And now you will live to possibly regret it.”
― Kim Harrison, The Outlaw Demon Wails

“Go to sleep, baby, Mama will sing. Of blue butterflies, and dragonfly wings. Moonlight and sunbeams, raiment so fine. Silver and gold, for baby of mine. Go to sleep, baby. Sister will tell, of wolves and of lambs, and demons who fell.”
― Kim Harrison, Black Magic Sanction

“Jenks enthusiastically leaned against the counter and opened the box. Bypassing the plastic knife, he broke off about a third of it and took a huge bite. Ivy watched, appalled, and I shrugged. His mouth moving as he hummed, Jenks finished unpacking the sacks. I was half dead, Ivy was whoring herself to keep me safe, but Jenks was okay as long as he had chocolate.”
― Kim Harrison, A Fistful of Charms

“You need a new hobby, Rachel. Something other than nasty little men with visions of world domination.”
― Kim Harrison, Pale Demon

“Hey, you freakin' bastard," I breathed. "You hit me again and I'll take care of your family planning.”
― Kim Harrison, Every Which Way But Dead

“I only snatched him to get your attention,” I said. “Now that I’ve got it, this is what I want.”
“Damn my dame!” Al shouted, hands raised to the ceiling. “I knew it! Not another list!”
― Kim Harrison, White Witch, Black Curse

“What are you doing in Nicky's room, Rachel? Oooh! He summoned you to the west coast, didn't he? Did you kill him? Good for you taking care of that little problem? I should give you a bunny!" - Algaliarept”
― Kim Harrison, Black Magic Sanction

“No, you just keep crashing my life. Look—" I said, and Al grunted.
"Here it comes," the demon muttered. "Listen. Listen to this, runt. She's going to have a list.”
― Kim Harrison, Black Magic Sanction

“You look like the vamp who bled the cat.”
― Kim Harrison, Every Which Way But Dead

“the mad have a grace all their own”
― Kim Harrison, Every Which Way But Dead

“Come work for me, and I’ll tell you.”
My eyes went to his. “You are a thief, a cheat, a murderer, and a not-nice man,” I said calmly. “I don’t like you.”
He shrugged, the motion making him look utterly harmless. “I’m not a thief,” he said. “And I don’t mind manipulating you into working for me when I need it.” He smiled, showing me perfect teeth. “I enjoy it, actually.”
― Kim Harrison, The Good, the Bad, and the Undead

“Your welcome means more to me, Ivy Alisha Tamwood, than a thousand souls. Watching Rachel work is a wonder of one catastrophe after another.”
― Kim Harrison