Sarah > Sarah's Quotes

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  • #1
    W.C. Fields
    “I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally. ”
    ― W.C. Fields
    18673 likes

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  • #2
    Bill Watterson
    “Reality continues to ruin my life.”
    ― Bill Watterson, The Complete Calvin and Hobbes
    tags: calvin-and-hobbes, humor, life
    21199 likes

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  • #3
    Charles J. Sykes
    “Be nice to nerds. You may end up working for them. We all could.”
    ― Charles J. Sykes, Dumbing Down Our Kids: Why American Children Feel Good About Themselves But Can't Read, Write or Add
    tags: humor, misattributed-to-bill-gates, nerd, nerds, work
    15549 likes

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  • #4
    George Carlin
    “The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.”
    ― George Carlin
    tags: humor, insanity, lies, lying, self-indulgence, truth
    19798 likes

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  • #5
    Charles Bukowski
    “Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must lead.”
    ― Charles Bukowski
    tags: humor
    22513 likes

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  • #6
    Markus Herz
    “Be careful about reading health books. Some fine day you'll die of a misprint.”
    ― Markus Herz
    tags: books, health, humor, misattributed-mark-twain, misprints
    13740 likes

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  • #7
    I love mankind ... it's people I can't stand!!
    “I love mankind ... it's people I can't stand!!”
    ― Charles M. Schulz
    tags: humor, mankind, people
    18547 likes

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  • #8
    Terry Pratchett
    “The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.”
    ― Terry Pratchett, Diggers
    tags: humor, open-mind, thinking
    21432 likes

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  • #9
    John Green
    “Saying 'I notice you're a nerd' is like saying, 'Hey, I notice that you'd rather be intelligent than be stupid, that you'd rather be thoughtful than be vapid, that you believe that there are things that matter more than the arrest record of Lindsay Lohan. Why is that?' In fact, it seems to me that most contemporary insults are pretty lame. Even 'lame' is kind of lame. Saying 'You're lame' is like saying 'You walk with a limp.' Yeah, whatever, so does 50 Cent, and he's done all right for himself.”
    ― John Green
    tags: humor, nerdfighters
    21598 likes

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  • #10
    Charles M. Schulz
    “All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.”
    ― Charles M. Schulz
    tags: chocolate, food, humor
    26801 likes

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  • #11
    Alexandre Dumas fils
    “The difference between genius and stupidity is: genius has its limits.”
    ― Alexandre Dumas-fils
    tags: misattributed-to-einstein
    21519 likes

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  • #12
    Woody Allen
    “I'm not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.”
    ― Woody Allen
    tags: death, fear, humor, life
    25648 likes

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  • #13
    “Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away.”
    ― Paul Terry
    tags: exercise, humor, laziness, misattributed-to-hutchins
    24392 likes

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  • #14
    Garrison Keillor
    “Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car.”
    ― Garrison Keillor
    tags: humor, religion
    30270 likes

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  • #15
    Douglas Adams
    “I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.”
    ― Douglas Adams, The Salmon of Doubt: Hitchhiking the Galaxy One Last Time
    tags: deadlines, humor, humour, work, writing
    32151 likes

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  • #16
    Steve Martin
    “A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.”
    ― Steve Martin
    tags: humor, obvious, simile
    35261 likes

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  • #17
    Jane Austen
    “The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid.”
    ― Jane Austen, Northanger Abbey
    tags: aliteracy, books, classic, humor
    51630 likes

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  • #18
    “Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results.”
    ― Narcotics Anonymous
    tags: humor, insanity, life, misattributed-ben-franklin, misattributed-mark-twain, misattributed-to-einstein
    64694 likes

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  • #19
    Albert Einstein
    “Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”
    ― Albert Einstein
    tags: attributed-no-source, human-nature, humor, infinity, philosophy, science, stupidity, universe
    148506 likes

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  • #21
    William Shakespeare
    “The fool doth think he is wise, but the wise man knows himself to be a fool.”
    ― William Shakespeare, As You Like It
    tags: wisdom
    45345 likes

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  • #22
    Aristotle
    “Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.”
    ― Aristotle
    tags: introspection, self-discovery, wisdom
    16287 likes

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  • #23
    Socrates
    “The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing.”
    ― Socrates
    tags: knowledge, wisdom
    15514 likes

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  • #24
    Isaac Asimov
    “The saddest aspect of life right now is that science gathers knowledge faster than society gathers wisdom.”
    ― Isaac Asimov
    tags: life, science, wisdom
    13985 likes

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  • #25
    Mark Twain
    “In a good bookroom you feel in some mysterious way that you are absorbing the wisdom contained in all the books through your skin, without even opening them.”
    ― Mark Twain
    tags: bookroom, books, libraries, wisdom
    10425 likes

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  • #26
    J.R.R. Tolkien
    “Never laugh at live dragons.”
    ― J.R.R. Tolkien
    tags: dragons, wisdom
    8728 likes

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  • #27
    Fran Lebowitz
    “Think before you speak. Read before you think.”
    ― Fran Lebowitz, The Fran Lebowitz Reader
    tags: advice-for-daily-living, books, reader, reading, speaking, thinking, wisdom
    7770 likes

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  • #28
    Oprah Winfrey
    “Turn your wounds into wisdom.”
    ― Oprah Winfrey
    tags: experience, inspirational, pain, wisdom, wounds
    6854 likes

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  • #29
    Chad Sugg
    “If you're reading this...
    Congratulations, you're alive.
    If that's not something to smile about,
    then I don't know what is.”
    ― Chad Sugg, Monsters Under Your Head
    tags: alive, congratulations, hope, humanity, inspiration, inspirational, inspire, life, poetry, smile, wisdom
    8485 likes

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  • #30
    Confucius
    “By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; Second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest.”
    ― Confucious
    tags: wisdom
    6117 likes

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  • #31
    Martin Luther King Jr.
    “Let no man pull you so low as to hate him.”
    ― Martin Luther King Jr., A Knock at Midnight: Inspiration from the Great Sermons of Reverend Martin Luther King, Jr.
    tags: hatred, wisdom
    5480 likes



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humor
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