Giselle > Giselle's Quotes

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  • #1
    Jane Austen
    “What are men to rocks and mountains?”
    Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice

  • #2
    Elizabeth Gaskell
    “The French girls would tell you, to believe that you were pretty would make you so.”
    Elizabeth Gaskell, Wives and Daughters

  • #3
    Eoin Colfer
    “Confidence is ignorance. If you're feeling cocky, it's because there's something you don't know.”
    Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

  • #4
    Eoin Colfer
    “If I win, I'm a prodigy. If I lose, then I'm crazy. That's the way history is written.”
    Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

  • #5
    Eoin Colfer
    “Hey, look—your girlfriend is saying something."
    Artemis had a vast mental reserve of scathing comebacks at his disposal, but none of them covered girlfriend insults. He wasn't even sure if it was an insult. And if it was, who was being insulted? Him or the girl?”
    Eoin Colfer

  • #6
    Eoin Colfer
    “I can't imagine what they're planning. But I can tell you two things. We won't like it, and it won't be legal.”
    Eoin Colfer, The Artemis Fowl Files

  • #7
    Eoin Colfer
    “I never tell anyone exactly how clever I am. They would be too scared.”
    Eoin Colfer, The Eternity Code

  • #8
    Eoin Colfer
    “A CD. How quaint. We have these in museums.”
    Eoin Colfer, The Eternity Code

  • #9
    Eoin Colfer
    “You know you're in trouble when your own imagination starts punishing you.”
    Eoin Colfer

  • #10
    Eoin Colfer
    “Being in command means making tough decisions. Not being in command means shutting up and doing what you're told.
    --Artemis Fowl”
    Eoin Colfer, The Artemis Fowl Files

  • #11
    Eoin Colfer
    “Artemis: (shocked) Why, Doctor? This is a sensitive area. For all you know I could be suffering from depression.
    Doctor Po: I suppose you could. Is that the case?
    Artemis: (head in hands) It's my mother, Doctor.
    Doctor Po: Yes?
    Artemis: My mother, she...
    Doctor Po: Your mother, yes?
    Artemis: She forces me to endure this ridiculous therapy when the school's so-called counsellors are little better than misguided do-gooders with degrees.”
    Eoin Colfer, The Arctic Incident

  • #12
    Eoin Colfer
    “You wouldn't know a clue if it danced in front of you with a T-Shirt that read 'I'm a clue”
    Eoin Colfer

  • #13
    Eoin Colfer
    “I am unarmed. But Butler here, my ...ah...butler, has a Sig Saucer in his shoulder holster, two shrike-throwing knives in his boots, aderringer two-shot up his sleeve, garrotte wire in his watch, and three stun greanades concealed in variouse pockets. Anything else, Butler?”
    Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

  • #14
    Eoin Colfer
    “Listen to me, goblin. You're stupid, let's accept that and move on.”
    Eoin Colfer, The Eternity Code

  • #15
    Eoin Colfer
    “If it looks like a Dwarf, and it smells like a Dwarf, then it's probably a Dwarf or a latrine wearing dungerees.”
    Eoin Colfer, The Lost Colony

  • #16
    Eoin Colfer
    “Who are you?" he asked.
    I am the future queen of this world, at the very least. You may refer to me as Mistress Koboi for the next five minutes. After that you may refer to me as Aaaaarrrrgh, hold your throat, die screaming, and so on.”
    Eoin Colfer, The Time Paradox

  • #17
    Eoin Colfer
    “And one more thing. About my name — Artemis — you were right. In London, it is generally a female name, after the Greek goddess of archery. But every now and then a male comes along with such a talent for hunting that he earns the right to use the name. I am that male. Artemis the hunter. I hunted you.”
    Eoin Colfer, The Eternity Code

  • #18
    Eoin Colfer
    “What's that supposed to mean? A wolf's head on a stick. Big wolf barbecue tonight? Bring your own wolf?”
    Eoin Colfer, The Lost Colony

  • #19
    Eoin Colfer
    “The problem is that I know the textbook answers to any question you care to ask.”
    Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

  • #20
    Eoin Colfer
    “No matter what dimension you're in, there's a big-headed male trying to take over the world.”
    Eoin Colfer, The Lost Colony

  • #21
    Eoin Colfer
    “Certainly, Doctor. Let's talk about your chair. Victorian?”
    Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

  • #22
    Eoin Colfer
    “I bet," said Mulch, "that you would set the world on fire just to watch it burn."
    Opal tapped the suggestion into a small electronic notepad on her pocket computer.
    Thanks for that. Now, tell me everything.”
    Eoin Colfer, The Time Paradox

  • #23
    Eoin Colfer
    “Let us proceed under the assumption that the fairy folk do exist, and that I am not a gibbering moron.”
    Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

  • #24
    Eoin Colfer
    “Artemis: "Right, brothers. Onward. Imagine yourself seated at a cafe in Montmartre."

    Myles: "In Paris."

    Artemis: "Yes, Paris. And try as you will, you cannot attract the waiter's attention. What do you do?"

    Beckett: "Umm...tell Butler to jump-jump-jump on his head?"

    Myles: "I agree with simple-toon."

    Artemis: "No! You simply raise one finger and say clearly 'ici, garcon.'"

    Beckett: "Itchy what?”
    Eoin Colfer

  • #25
    Eoin Colfer
    “I'm not threatening you. I'm just informing you of police procedure. If you continue to obstruct me, I remove the obstruction, in this case you, and proceed to the next command.”
    Eoin Colfer, The Arctic Incident

  • #26
    Eoin Colfer
    “If Koboi defeats and presumably murders us both then you can consider the debt null and void.”
    Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

  • #27
    Eoin Colfer
    “Listen to me, convict. I have not traveled all this way to listen to your war stories. So shut your trap before I shut it for you.

    Commander Julius Root”
    Eoin Colfer
    tags: humor

  • #28
    Eoin Colfer
    “Artemis felt like he was six again and caught hacking the school computers trying to make the test questions harder”
    Eoin Colfer, The Time Paradox

  • #29
    Eoin Colfer
    “Oh,It's going to be so easy to kill you",scoffed Opal.”
    Eoin Colfer, The Criminal Mastermind Collection, Bks 1-3

  • #30
    Eoin Colfer
    “That was horrible. Horrible. That poor little guy."
    Pex was unrepentant. "Yeah, well, he asked for it. Calling us ... all those things."
    But---buried alive! That's like in that horror movie. Y'know -- the one with all the horror."
    I think I saw that one. With all the words going up on the screen at the end?"
    Yeah, that was it. Tell you the truth, those words kinda ruined it for me.”
    Eoin Colfer, The Eternity Code



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