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  • #1
    Kerrelyn Sparks
    “What are you waiting for?" shanna asked. "He's dying! Do it!"
    Conner looked at Angus. "Ye do it. It was yer idea."
    "Nay? Ye were the first to suggest it. Ye do it."
    "I'm no' touching him." Conner said.
    He nudged Phineas "Ye do it."
    "I don't even know how!" Phineas poked at Robby. "You do it."
    "Why me?" Robby turned to Angus. "Ye're the expert. Ye do it."
    Angus grimaced. "I'm no' doing it. I hate the bugger."
    "Stop it!" Shanna screamed "You- Forget it! I'll do it myself."
    "Shanna you don't know how," Roman said.
    "Gods blood. I guess I have to do it."
    "You guess?" Shanna cried "Are you going to let him die?"
    "He threatens to kill me every time he sees me.”
    Kerrelyn Sparks, Vampire Mine
    tags: funny

  • #2
    Kerrelyn Sparks
    “She stumbled back a step. “Carlos was the…?”
    “Panther, aye.”
    “He’s a cat?” And her boss was a dog. She shook her head. Was her next door neighbor a goldfish?”
    Kerrelyn Sparks, The Vampire and the Virgin

  • #3
    Kerrelyn Sparks
    “I'll talk to him before I go," Carlos grumbled.
    "And what about the girls?" Toni asked. "They need you, Carlos."
    "They need a mother!" Carlos yelled. "And I need a mate."
    Caitlyn gasped. Hes was looking for a mate? What kind of mate? His gaze shifted towards her, and his eyes glittered with a hard, angry look.
    "You--what?" Toni stepped back, apparently stunned.
    "You heard me," Carlos growled.
    "Ye want to get married?" the Scotsman asked.
    "Don't look so shocked, Ian. Didn't want you want to get married?"
    "Aye, but--"
    "You can't get married," Toni declared. "You're gay."
    Caitlyn snorted. Were they crazy?
    Carlos glared at her in the shadows, then shifted his gaze to Toni. "I never said I was gay."
    "Of course you're gay," she insisted. "I saw you dance the samba in a hot pink sequined thong."
    Carlos shrugged. "So? You said I was very sexy. You were practically drooling."
    Ian stiffened. "When was this?"
    "Before I met you," Toni muttered.”
    Kerrelyn Sparks, Eat Prey Love
    tags: humor

  • #4
    Kerrelyn Sparks
    “Oh yeah. It would be terrible for you to have only one working fang. Your friends might want to call you Lefty”
    Kerrelyn Sparks, How to Marry a Millionaire Vampire

  • #5
    Kerrelyn Sparks
    “That’s Carlos?” Phineas lowered his sword and whistled under his breath. “Hello, kitty.”
    Kerrelyn Sparks, All I Want for Christmas is a Vampire

  • #6
    Kerrelyn Sparks
    “Well, guess what?"
    Shanna's excited voice interrupted his thoughts. "They're going to have twins! Isn't that exciting!"
    Robby nodded. "Aye. I can barely contain myself."
    She gave him a wry look. "You should try to be happy for your friends."
    "I am. I'm delighted that everyone but me is happily married and multiplying like bloody rabbits.”
    Kerrelyn Sparks, The Vampire and the Virgin

  • #7
    Kerrelyn Sparks
    “This is Ian. He's no' usually speechless. Or so well dressed."
    -Conner
    I shouldna wear my best clothes to meet an angel from heaven?"
    -Ian
    "You look very nice, I love your shirt."
    -Marielle
    "Thank you"
    -Ian
    "I have a shirt like that, too."
    -Conner”
    Kerrelyn Sparks, Vampire Mine

  • #8
    Kerrelyn Sparks
    “Ignore him," Heather begged. "I do. Constantly." Jean-Luc studied the coach, then turned to Heather with a wary look. "Every man in this town wants you." She laughed. "Yea, right. The old guys from the nursing home go into cardiac arrest whenever I walk by." His gaze drifted over her. "I can believe that.”
    Kerrelyn Sparks, The Undead Next Door

  • #9
    Kerrelyn Sparks
    “Phineas gave Abigail an encouraging smile. “Chillax, dudette. He didn’t want to bite you.”
    She wondered if she’d overreacted. “He didn’t?”
    “Naw.” Phineas smirked. “He just wanted to jump your bones.”
    Kerrelyn Sparks, Sexiest Vampire Alive

  • #10
    Kerrelyn Sparks
    “Shanna planted her hands on her hips.
    "Getting drunk is not going to solve your problems."
    "Aye, but t'will make me no' give a damn."(Robby)”
    Kerrelyn Sparks, The Vampire and the Virgin

  • #11
    Kerrelyn Sparks
    “I see.” The nurse nodded. “How can I help you?”
    “I’m Inspector Mc—” Phineas halted, obviously having second thoughts about using his real name.
    “Man-boob,” Brynley finished for him.
    He stiffened.
    “What can I do for you, Inspector McMan-boob?” the nurse asked.
    He gritted his teeth. “It’s muscle.”
    “Inspector Muscle?” the nurse asked.
    “Yes. Exactly.” He gave Brynley a triumphant look. “And this is my assistant, Nurse—”
    “Doctor,” Brynley corrected him.
    “Doctor . . .” He glanced down at her chest. “A-cup.”
    “B-cup!”
    He arched a brow. “You’ll have to prove it.”
    Kerrelyn Sparks, Wanted: Undead or Alive

  • #12
    Kerrelyn Sparks
    “Gregori leaned forward. "Can you believe it? We're all a bunch of mutants! Just like the Ninja Turtles."
    Angus blinked. "We - we're like... turtles?"
    Gregori burst out lauging.
    Ian shook his head, grinning.
    Connor snorted. "Nay. We have vampire DNA. No turtles.”
    Kerrelyn Sparks, Be Still My Vampire Heart

  • #13
    Kerrelyn Sparks
    “I can’t date a man who has survived for centuries by biting women and sucking their blood.” — Heather
    “I bet he gives one hell of a hickey.” — Fidelia”
    Kerrelyn Sparks, The Undead Next Door

  • #14
    Kerrelyn Sparks
    “His mouth tilted and his eyes twinkled. "I knew it. One look into yer eyes and I could fall at yet feet.”
    Kerrelyn Sparks, The Vampire and the Virgin
    tags: love

  • #15
    Kerrelyn Sparks
    “Wasn’t it wonderful of Angus and Emma to spring for first class tickets?”
    “Yes.”
    “It’s an incredibly long flight, you know.”
    “Yes.”
    “They’ll show us a movie or two.”
    “Yes.”
    She leaned close to him, smiling. “I love traveling with you. You’re so agreeable.”
    He gave her an annoyed look. “Are you going to talk the whole time?”
    She smiled sweetly. “Yes.”
    Kerrelyn Sparks, Eat Prey Love

  • #16
    Kerrelyn Sparks
    “You’re a vampire?”
    Shanna’s eyes widened. “No. I’m the same as I ever was.”
    “Oh, thank God.” Caitlyn pressed a hand to her chest and collapsed onto the chair. “You scared me to death.”
    Shanna smiled. “Relax, sweetie. I’m not a vampire.” She patted her arm. “My husband is.”
    Kerrelyn Sparks, Eat Prey Love

  • #17
    Kerrelyn Sparks
    “She looked at Connor. “How old are you?”
    His jaw shifted. “I doona discuss my private life.”
    “I can translate that for you,” Phineas offered. “It means he’s embarrassed he was a caveman and ate brontosaurus burgers for lunch.”
    Connor arched an eyebrow at him. “The correct translation is ‘sod off.’ ”
    Kerrelyn Sparks, Vampire Mine

  • #18
    Kerrelyn Sparks
    “How could everything go so wrong so fast? For goodness’ sake, she was only looking for a few plants. But instead, she’d found a whole village of mind-controlled slaves and a whole army of acrobatic kung fu vampires.”
    Kerrelyn Sparks, Sexiest Vampire Alive

  • #19
    Kerrelyn Sparks
    “Why? What kind of man would pleasure his woman by hurting her.' Angus paced across the path. ''Tis a man's duty, nay, his privilege, to give his woman all the pleasure she can bear. She should be panting and writhing with pleasure.'

    Emma remained silent, staring at him. Did she not believe him?

    He walked toward her. 'A real man would take all night if need be to make sure his woman was fully sated. She should be screaming that she canna endure any more.'

    Emma's eyes widened.

    'It should be a man's greatest pleasure to see his woman shuddering in the throes of passion.'

    She took a deep breath and shifted her weight from one foot to another.

    He paced back and forth. 'Only when she is begging for him should a man see to his own needs. And he should never, ever harm her.' He stopped in front of her 'Am I totally wrong in this?'

    'No,' she squeaked.”
    Kerrelyn Sparks, Be Still My Vampire Heart

  • #20
    Kerrelyn Sparks
    “Merda! Her lace panties had snagged on his ring, the signet ring he'd inherited from his father, Giacomo Casanova. His father had seduced hundred of women without any problems whatsoever, and he was having trouble with just one. This was the real reason he never used the Casanova name. He could never live up to his father's reputation. The old man was probably laughing in his grave.

    Nine circles of hell," Jack muttered.

    Hell?" Lara asked. "I thought I was the Holy Land."

    You're paradise. Unfortunately, I am stuck there."

    Her eyes widened. "Stuck?"

    Normally, I would love being stuck to your lovely bum, but it would look odd if we go sightseeing with my hand under your skirt. Especially in the basilica."

    She glanced down. "How can you be stuck?"

    My ring. It's caught in the lace. See?" He moved his hand down her hip, dragging her undies down a few inches.

    Okay, stop." She bit her lip, frowning, then suddenly giggled. "I can't believe this has happened."

    I assure you, as much as I had hoped to get your clothes off, this was not part of my original plan."

    She snorted. "No problem. Just rip yourself loose."

    Are you sure?" It will destroy you undies."

    She narrowed her eyes with a seductuve look. "Rip it."

    Very well." He jerked his hand away, but the panties came with him. He yanked his hand back and forth, but the lacy, latex material simply stretched with him. "Santo cielo, they are indestructible."

    Lara laughed.

    He continued to wage battle, but to no avail. "They could use this material to build spaceships.”
    Kerrelyn Sparks, Secret Life of a Vampire

  • #21
    Kerrelyn Sparks
    “Love doesn’t please itself by seeking revenge. Love sacrifices itself for the good of others.”
    Kerrelyn Sparks, Be Still My Vampire Heart

  • #22
    Erol Ozan
    “Help someone, you earn a friend. Help someone too much, you make an enemy.”
    Erol Ozan

  • #23
    Cecelia Ahern
    “That's the thing about lessons, you always learn them when you don't expect them or want them.”
    Cecelia Ahern, If You Could See Me Now

  • #24
    Jennifer  Brown
    “Just like there's always time for pain, there's always time for healing.”
    Jennifer Brown, Hate List

  • #25
    Joe Hill
    “You think you know someone. But mostly you just know what you want to know.”
    Joe Hill, Horns

  • #26
    H. Jackson Brown Jr.
    “I've learned... . That being kind is more important than being right.”
    H. Jackson Brown Jr., Live and Learn and Pass It on: People Ages 5 to 95 Share What They'Ve Discovered About Life, Love, and Other Good Stuff

  • #27
    Santosh Kalwar
    “Always be fearless. Walk like lion, talk like pigeons, live like elephants and love like an infant child.”
    Santosh Kalwar, Quote Me Everyday

  • #28
    June Ahern
    “How hurtful it can be to deny one's true self and live a life of lies just to appease others.”
    June Ahern

  • #29
    Rudyard Kipling
    “I always prefer to believe the best of everybody; it saves so much trouble”
    Rudyard Kipling

  • #30
    Stieg Larsson
    “Then I discovered that being related is no guarantee of love!”
    Stieg Larsson, The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo



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