Angie > Angie's Quotes

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  • #1
    Stephenie Meyer
    “He's like a drug for you, Bella.”
    ― Stephenie Meyer, Eclipse
    19594 likes

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  • #2
    Golda Meir
    “Don't be so humble - you are not that great.”
    ― Golda Meir
    tags: funny, golda, meir, true
    3532 likes

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  • #3
    Albert Camus
    “Don’t walk in front of me… I may not follow
    Don’t walk behind me… I may not lead
    Walk beside me… just be my friend”
    ― Albert Camus
    tags: attributed-no-source, friends, friendship, misattributed-albert-camus
    93551 likes

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  • #4
    Bernard M. Baruch
    “Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.”
    ― Bernard M. Baruch
    tags: ataraxy, be-yourself, confidence, fitting-in, individuality, misattributed-dr-seuss, those-who-matter
    130215 likes

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  • #5
    Albert Einstein
    “Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”
    ― Albert Einstein
    tags: attributed-no-source, human-nature, humor, infinity, philosophy, science, stupidity, universe
    148455 likes

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  • #6
    I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control
    “I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.”
    ― Marilyn Monroe
    tags: attributed-no-source, best, life, love, misattributed-marilyn-monroe, mistakes, out-of-control, truth, worst
    165274 likes

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  • #7
    “Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results.”
    ― Narcotics Anonymous
    tags: humor, insanity, life, misattributed-ben-franklin, misattributed-mark-twain, misattributed-to-einstein
    64659 likes

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  • #8
    Frank Zappa
    “So many books, so little time.”
    ― Frank Zappa
    tags: books, humor
    151508 likes

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  • #9
    Maurice Switzer
    “It is better to remain silent at the risk of being thought a fool, than to talk and remove all doubt of it.”
    ― Maurice Switzer, Mrs. Goose, Her Book
    tags: misattributed-to-abraham-lincoln, misattributed-to-mark-twain, remaining-silent, wisdom
    44325 likes

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  • #10
    H. Jackson Brown Jr.
    “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”
    ― H. Jackson Brown Jr., P.S. I Love You
    tags: actions, disappointed, disappointment, dream, dreams, explore, misattributed-mark-twain, sail
    60266 likes

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  • #11
    Groucho Marx
    “Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.”
    ― Groucho Marx, The Essential Groucho: Writings For By And About Groucho Marx
    tags: animals, books, dogs, friends, humor
    37987 likes

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  • #12
    William Shakespeare
    “The fool doth think he is wise, but the wise man knows himself to be a fool.”
    ― William Shakespeare, As You Like It
    tags: wisdom
    45304 likes

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  • #13
    Jim Henson
    “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye.”
    ― Jim Henson
    26437 likes

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  • #14
    Steve Martin
    “A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.”
    ― Steve Martin
    tags: humor, obvious, simile
    35265 likes

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  • #15
    Friedrich Nietzsche
    “Without music, life would be a mistake.”
    ― Friedrich Nietzsche, Twilight of the Idols
    tags: inspirational, music, philosophy
    74354 likes

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  • #16
    Friedrich Nietzsche
    “That which does not kill us makes us stronger.”
    ― Friedrich Nietzsche
    tags: paraphrased, strength
    34013 likes

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  • #17
    John Green
    “I figured something out. The future is unpredictable.”
    ― John Green, An Abundance of Katherines
    tags: humor, inspirational, obvious, stupid
    2330 likes

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  • #18
    “Achmed the Dead Terrorist: Knock, knock.
    Jeff Dunham: Who's there?
    Achmed the Dead Terrorist: Me, I kill you!”
    ― Jeff Dunham
    52 likes

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  • #19
    “Silence! I kill you!”
    ― Jeff Dunham
    62 likes

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  • #20
    “Jeff: You know, you don't have to do this.
    Walter: Yeah, I could get a real job.
    Jeff: What would you do?
    Walter: I wanna be a greeter at Wal-Mart.
    Walter: What the hell's so funny?
    Jeff: At Wal-Mart, what would be your opening line?
    Walter: Oh.
    Walter: Welcome to Wal-Mart. Get your shit and get out!
    Walter: Have a nice day!”
    ― Jeff Dunham
    49 likes

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  • #21
    “Jeff: The drive from the valley?
    Peanut: Was bad as hell!
    Jeff: Traffic?
    Peanut: Sucked like hell!
    Jeff: Drivers?
    Peanut: Angry as hell!
    Jeff: And you?
    Peanut: Were scared as hell!
    Jeff: Parking?
    Peanut: Sucked more like hell!
    Jeff: So?
    Peanut: We're in hell! ”
    ― Jeff Dunham
    59 likes

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  • #22
    “Jeff-did you guys have a good day?
    Jose-no
    Jeff-why
    Jose-he got my stick jammed in the car door
    Jeff-what?did you say sorry
    Jose- no
    Jeff- why didn't you say sorry
    Jose- cause he couldn't breath
    Jeff-why couldn't he breath
    Jose- cause he was laughing to hard”
    ― Jeff Dunham
    35 likes

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  • #23
    “Jeff: You know most people who've had near death experiances say they say a white light. What did you see?

    Akmed: I saw flying car parts!


    Jeff: What was the last thing that went through your mind?


    Akmed: My ass. But I saw a blue Prius! Is it true you have one of those? Did you know that if your driving down the highway in a Prius and you stick your hand out the window the car will turn?!”
    ― Jeff Dunham
    26 likes



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Tags From Angie’s Quotes

funny
golda
meir
true
attributed-no-source
friends
friendship
misattributed-albert-camus
ataraxy
be-yourself
confidence
fitting-in
individuality
misattributed-dr-seuss
those-who-matter
human-nature
humor
infinity
philosophy
science
stupidity
universe
best
life
love
misattributed-marilyn-monroe
mistakes
out-of-control
truth
worst
insanity
misattributed-ben-franklin
misattributed-mark-twain
misattributed-to-einstein
books
misattributed-to-abraham-lincoln
misattributed-to-mark-twain
remaining-silent
wisdom
actions
disappointed
disappointment
dream
dreams
explore
sail
animals
dogs
obvious
simile
inspirational
music
paraphrased
strength
stupid