Cheryl Hellandbrand > Cheryl's Quotes

Showing 1-14 of 14

#1

“It is better to risk saving a guilty person than to condemn an innocent one.”
― Voltaire, Zadig et autres contes

tags: condemnation, guilt, innocence, judgment, justice, mercy, reasonable-doubt, verdict

777 likes

#2

“The reality is, no matter what you were told, whatever happened to you as a child was not legally or morally your fault. Abused children are instilled with guilt regarding their "participation." It's an especially complex issue if the abuser is a family member. The child is told and believes that by his word his family will disintegrate, or harm may descend upon other loved ones. He fears he will lose more by telling than not.”
― Sarah E. Olson, Becoming One: A Story of Triumph Over Dissociative Identity Disorder

tags: blame, breakup, child-abuse, child-abuser, child-sexual-abuse, fear, guilt, lies, pedophile, self-blame, shame, silence, victim-blaming

16 likes

#3

“Attitude Is Everything

We live in a culture that is blind to betrayal and intolerant of emotional pain. In New Age crowds here on the West Coast, where your attitude is considered the sole determinant of the impact an event has on you, it gets even worse.In these New Thought circles, no matter what happens to you, it is assumed that you have created your own reality. Not only have you chosen the event, no matter how horrible, for your personal growth. You also chose how you interpret what happened—as if there are no interpersonal facts, only interpretations.

The upshot of this perspective is that your suffering would vanish if only you adopted a more evolved perspective and stopped feeling aggrieved. I was often kindly reminded (and believed it myself), “there are no victims.” How can you be a victim when you are responsible for your circumstances?

When you most need validation and support to get through the worst pain of your life, to be confronted with the well-meaning, but quasi-religious fervor of these insidious half-truths can be deeply demoralizing. This kind of advice feeds guilt and shame, inhibits grieving, encourages grandiosity and can drive you to be alone to shield your vulnerability.”
― Sandra Lee Dennis

tags: attitude, bad-advice, belief-in-self, betrayal, blind-to-betrayal, demoralizing, emotional-pain, false-perspective, guilt, half-truths, insidious, intolerance, invalidation, loss-of-belief, mental-health, positive-attitude, ptsd, responsibility, shame, stigma, stigmatization, suffering, trauma, traumatic, traumatization, traumatized, unsupportive, victim-blaming, victimhood, victims

126 likes

#4

“It is not lies or a lack of loyalty that ends a relationship. It is the agonizing truth that one person feels in their heart on a daily basis. It is realizing that you are coping and not living. It is the false belief that there is a verse, quote, phrase or talk that will magically make you feel content, complete or not care. However, it doesn’t last longer than a few days, before your mind and heart goes back to what it wants. It is the moment you realize that you left without ever leaving. It is the moment you realize that fear, shame or guilt is the only thing standing in the way of the life God meant for you to live.”
― Shannon L. Alder

tags: battles, beginnings, choices, divorce, fear, friendship, future, god-s-plan, guardian-angel, guilt, knowing, letting-go, living-a-lie, love, marriage, pain, relationships, shame, sorrow, ties

107 likes

#5

“Everyone has the right to tell the truth about her own life.”
― Ellen Bass, The Courage to Heal: A Guide for Women Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse

68 likes

#6

“She will rise. With a spine of steel and a roar like thunder, she will rise.”
― Nicole Lyons

tags: inspirational, motivational, rise, rise-quotes, rise-up, strong-women

68 likes

#7

“The deepest pain I ever felt was denying my own feelings to make everyone else comfortable.”
― Nicole Lyons

tags: emotion, feelings, pain

12 likes

#8

“I have licked the fire and danced in the ashes of every bridge I ever burned. I fear no hell from you.”
― Nicole Lyons, Hush

tags: life, life-lessons, life-quotes, motivation, motivational, nicole-lyons, passion, poetry-is-not-dead, poetry-quotes, quote, quote-of-the-day, quotes, quotes-to-live-by, strength, strong, strong-women, truth, unafraid

72 likes

#9

“If I could claw the words out of the back of my throat and give them, dripping of me, to you, we would talk of sticky hands, and the messes they make.”
― Nicole Lyons

tags: ignored, poetry, poetry-quotes

9 likes

#10

“I have never seen battles quite as terrifyingly beautiful as the ones I fight when my mind splinters and races, to swallow me into my own madness, again.”
― Nicole Lyons, Hush

tags: bipolar-disorder, bipolar-quotes, chaos, creativity, depression-quotes, life, life-quotes, madness, madness-and-sanity, manic-depression, mental-health-awareness, mental-health-quotes, mental-illness, mental-illness-quotes, mind, mindfulness, mood-disorders, paranoia, quote, quote-of-the-day, quotes-about-life, racing-thoughts, self-deception, self-destruction, stigma, stillness-of-the-mind, suicidal-ideation, suicidal-thoughts

130 likes

#11

“I kept you so well, buried beneath the darkest shame and stilled with filthy lies. Perhaps I should have dug deeper.”
― Nicole Lyons

tags: life-lessons, loss, love, memories, nicole-lyons, poetry, poetry-is-not-dead, poetry-quotes, quote, quotes, shame

5 likes

#12

“Whatever it is that stirs your soul, listen to that. Everything else is just noise.”
― Nicole Lyons

tags: nicole-lyons, quote, quote-of-the-day, quotes, quotes-to-live-by, soul, soul-quotes, word-porn, words-of-wisdom, words-to-live-by

12 likes

#13

“Sometimes love is nothing more than a sticky web; illusions spun from clever minds and bitter hearts.”
― Nicole Lyons

tags: life, life-lessons, life-quotes, love, love-and-life-quotes, love-quotes, nicole-lyons, quote, quote-of-the-day, quotes, truth-and-lies, truth-quotes

9 likes

#14

“I hold you in the safest place I keep. Somewhere between memories and scars.”
― Nicole Lyons

tags: holding-on, love, love-quotes, memories, nicole-lyons, popular-quotes, quote, quote-of-the-day, scars, word-porn

15 likes

All Quotes

Cheryl Hellandbrand > Cheryl's Quotes

Tags From Cheryl’s Quotes