Crystal Chm > Crystal's Quotes

“Like bear...”
― Christopher Moore

“When it comes to God's existence, I'm not an atheist and I'm not agnostic. I'm an acrostic. The whole thing puzzles me.”
― George Carlin

“I read like fiends smoke crack”
― Duane Swierczynski

“The last thing I ever wanted was to be alive when the three most powerful people on the whole planet would be named Bush, Dick and Colon.”
― Kurt Vonnegut

“Books are to me as homemade tattoos are to an inmate. Can't get enough of them.”
― Laurie Notaro, I Love Everybody (and Other Atrocious Lies): True Tales of a Loudmouth Girl

“I can't believe anyone would voluntarily run 26 miles. Sometimes I sit on the couch cross-legged because I don't feel like walking to the bathroom.”
― jen lancaster

“Whaddaya mean 'old maids,' ha? The term is 'unclaimed treasure,' buddy, 'unclaimed treasure!”
― Laurie Notaro, Autobiography of a Fat Bride: True Tales of a Pretend Adulthood

“You know how sometimes you lie in bed at night and think, “What if the law of gravity just wears out and lets go and I drift into space?” Does that ever make you anxious?”
― Elaine May

“The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated.”
― Mahatma Gandhi

“Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.”
― Oscar Wilde