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Cody Apedaile > Cody's Quotes

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  • #1
    Douglas Adams
    “A towel, [The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy] says, is about the most massively useful thing an interstellar hitchhiker can have. Partly it has great practical value. You can wrap it around you for warmth as you bound across the cold moons of Jaglan Beta; you can lie on it on the brilliant marble-sanded beaches of Santraginus V, inhaling the heady sea vapors; you can sleep under it beneath the stars which shine so redly on the desert world of Kakrafoon; use it to sail a miniraft down the slow heavy River Moth; wet it for use in hand-to-hand-combat; wrap it round your head to ward off noxious fumes or avoid the gaze of the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal (such a mind-boggingly stupid animal, it assumes that if you can't see it, it can't see you); you can wave your towel in emergencies as a distress signal, and of course dry yourself off with it if it still seems to be clean enough.”
    ― Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy
    tags: hitchhiker-s-guide, humor
    1521 likes

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  • #2
    Erma Bombeck
    “When your mother asks, "Do you want a piece of advice?" it's a mere formality. It doesn't matter if you answer yes or no. You're going to get it anyway.”
    ― Erma Bombeck
    tags: family, humor, mothers
    1166 likes

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  • #3
    Lewis Carroll
    “have i gone mad?
    im afraid so, but let me tell you something, the best people usualy are.”
    ― Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland
    tags: humor
    2060 likes

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  • #4
    Dorothy Parker
    “Don't look at me in that tone of voice.”
    ― Dorothy Parker
    tags: disapproval, humor, wordplay
    1425 likes

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  • #5
    Tom Waits
    “My kids are starting to notice I'm a little different from the other dads. "Why don't you have a straight job like everyone else?" they asked me the other day.

    I told them this story:
    In the forest, there was a crooked tree and a straight tree. Every day, the straight tree would say to the crooked tree, "Look at me...I'm tall, and I'm straight, and I'm handsome. Look at you...you're all crooked and bent over. No one wants to look at you." And they grew up in that forest together. And then one day the loggers came, and they saw the crooked tree and the straight tree, and they said, "Just cut the straight trees and leave the rest." So the loggers turned all the straight trees into lumber and toothpicks and paper. And the crooked tree is still there, growing stronger and stranger every day.”
    ― Tom Waits
    tags: humor, individuality, music, musician, non-conformity
    1328 likes

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  • #6
    Patrick Rothfuss
    “Half of seeming clever is keeping your mouth shut at the right times.”
    ― Patrick Rothfuss, The Wise Man's Fear
    tags: humor, wisdom
    1861 likes

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  • #7
    P.G. Wodehouse
    “The voice of Love seemed to call to me, but it was a wrong number.”
    ― P.G. Wodehouse, Very Good, Jeeves!
    tags: humor, love
    1206 likes

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  • #8
    Bill Watterson
    “In my opinion, we don't devote nearly enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks.”
    ― Bill Watterson
    tags: humor, jerks, science
    1290 likes

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  • #9
    Benjamin Franklin
    “I didn't fail the test, I just found 100 ways to do it wrong.”
    ― Benjamin Franklin
    tags: examinations, failure, humor
    1196 likes

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  • #10
    George Carlin
    “I often warn people: "Somewhere along the way, someone is going to tell you, 'There is no "I" in team.' What you should tell them is, 'Maybe not. But there is an "I" in independence, individuality and integrity.”
    ― George Carlin
    tags: cliché, humor, individuality, retort
    1130 likes

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  • #11
    Alexandra Bracken
    “Let's carpe the hell out of this diem.”
    ― Alexandra Bracken, The Darkest Minds
    tags: alexandra-bracken, humor, the-darkest-minds
    1485 likes

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  • #12
    Jane Austen
    “Life seems but a quick succession of busy nothings.”
    ― Jane Austen, Mansfield Park
    tags: humor
    1316 likes

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  • #13
    Bill Watterson
    “We're so busy watching out for what's just ahead of us that we don't take time to enjoy where we are.”
    ― Bill Watterson
    tags: enjoy-life, humor, live-in-the-moment
    1107 likes

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  • #14
    “Humor keeps us alive. Humor and food. Don't forget food. You can go a week without laughing.”
    ― Joss Whedon
    tags: food, humor, survival, wit
    887 likes

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  • #15
    Winston S. Churchill
    “Don't interrupt me while I'm interrupting.”
    ― Winston S. Churchill
    tags: humor
    1000 likes

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  • #16
    “Procrastinate now, don't put it off.”
    ― Ellen DeGeneres
    tags: humor, paradox
    859 likes

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  • #17
    William Goldman
    “Cynics are simply thwarted romantics.”
    ― William Goldman, The Princess Bride
    tags: cynics, humor, life, romantics, writing
    987 likes

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  • #18
    Jarod Kintz
    “Laughter is the sound of the soul dancing. My soul probably looks like Fred Astaire.”
    ― Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not for Sale
    699 likes

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  • #19
    Dr. Seuss
    “It has often been said
    there’s so much to be read,
    you never can cram
    all those words in your head.

    So the writer who breeds
    more words than he needs
    is making a chore
    for the reader who reads.

    That's why my belief is
    the briefer the brief is,
    the greater the sigh
    of the reader's relief is.

    And that's why your books
    have such power and strength.
    You publish with shorth!
    (Shorth is better than length.)”
    ― Dr. Seuss
    tags: humor, writing
    832 likes

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  • #20
    “Sane is boring.”
    ― R. A. Salvatore
    tags: boring, crazy, forgotten-realms, funny, humor, jarlaxle, salvatore, sane, servant-of-the-shard
    928 likes

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  • #21
    Jarod Kintz
    “I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair.”
    ― Jarod Kintz, I Want
    618 likes

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  • #22
    “You're going to burn in a very special level of hell. A level they reserve for child molesters and people who talk at the theater.”
    ― Joss Whedon
    tags: humor, malediction
    755 likes

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  • #23
    Jim Butcher
    “Life is a journey. Time is a river. The door is ajar”
    ― Jim Butcher, Dead Beat
    tags: humor, life, metaphor, zen
    926 likes

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  • #24
    Libba Bray
    “I should never be left alone with my mind for too long.”
    ― Libba Bray
    tags: blog-post, humor, insanity
    803 likes

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  • #25
    Terry Pratchett
    “HUMAN BEINGS MAKE LIFE SO INTERESTING. DO YOU KNOW, THAT IN A UNIVERSE SO FULL OF WONDERS, THEY HAVE MANAGED TO INVENT BOREDOM. (Death)”
    ― Terry Pratchett, Hogfather
    tags: apathy, boredom, cynism, ennui, humor
    1322 likes

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  • #26
    A.A. Milne
    “It's snowing still," said Eeyore gloomily.
    "So it is."
    "And freezing."
    "Is it?"
    "Yes," said Eeyore. "However," he said, brightening up a little, "we haven't had an earthquake lately.”
    ― A.A. Milne
    tags: humor, optimism
    1536 likes

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  • #27
    Winston S. Churchill
    “Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.”
    ― Winston S. Churchill
    tags: attitude, humor, inspirational
    946 likes

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  • #28
    Jess C. Scott
    “A fit, healthy body—that is the best fashion statement”
    ― Jess C Scott
    tags: beauty, body, body-image, culture, dance, dancer, desire, fashion, fitness, food, food-for-thought, friendship, funny, girl, health, healthy, hip-hop, honesty, humor, humour, imagination, individuality, life, love, lust-for-life, music, novel, passion, reality, relationships, self, sex, truth, wisdom, young, young-adult, young-adult-fiction, young-adult-literature, young-adult-novels, young-adults, youth
    1097 likes

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  • #29
    George Carlin
    “Tell people there's an invisible man in the sky who created the universe, and the vast majority will believe you. Tell them the paint is wet, and they have to touch it to be sure.”
    ― George Carlin
    tags: absurdity, belief, credulity, doubt, evidence, gullibility, humor, indoctrination, invisible, reason, skepticism
    1209 likes

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  • #30
    Dr. Seuss
    “I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells.”
    ― Dr Suess
    tags: humor
    750 likes



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Tags From Cody’s Quotes

hitchhiker-s-guide
humor
family
mothers
disapproval
wordplay
individuality
music
musician
non-conformity
wisdom
love
jerks
science
examinations
failure
cliché
retort
alexandra-bracken
the-darkest-minds
enjoy-life
live-in-the-moment
food
survival
wit
paradox
cynics
life
romantics
writing
boring
crazy
forgotten-realms
funny
jarlaxle
salvatore
sane
servant-of-the-shard
malediction
metaphor
zen
blog-post
insanity
apathy
boredom
cynism
ennui
optimism
attitude
inspirational
beauty
body
body-image
culture
dance
dancer
desire
fashion
fitness
food-for-thought
friendship
girl
health
healthy
hip-hop
honesty
humour
imagination
lust-for-life
novel
passion
reality
relationships
self
sex
truth
young
young-adult
young-adult-fiction
young-adult-literature
young-adult-novels
young-adults
youth
absurdity
belief
credulity
doubt
evidence
gullibility
indoctrination
invisible
reason
skepticism