Quotes - Ruben Hernandez (The United States) Showing 1-30 of 310

#1

“And, like the great damned souls, I shall always feel that thinking is worth more than living.”
― Fernando Pessoa, The Book of Disquiet

154 likes

#2

“Don’t tell me about your god with your words. Show me about your god with your actions.”
― Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free

tags: actions, christian-behavior, god, inspirational, motivational, religion

171 likes

#3

“If you are allergic to a thing, it is best not to put that thing in your mouth, particularly if the thing is cats.”
― Lemony Snicket, The Wide Window

tags: humor-cats-allergies

4305 likes

#4

“I'm unpredictable, I never know where I'm going until I get there, I'm so random, I'm always growing, learning, changing, I'm never the same person twice. But one thing you can be sure of about me; is I will always do exactly what I want to do.”
― C. JoyBell C.

tags: change, character-defining, character-quote, growth, growth-life, inspirational, inspirational-attitude, inspiring, learning, life-and-living, random, stubbornness, unpredictable

985 likes

#5

“I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer”
― Douglas Adams

tags: attributed-no-source, humor, misattributed-douglas-adams, wit

11372 likes

#6

“Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must lead.”
― Charles Bukowski

tags: humor

22511 likes

#7

“I think I've discovered the secret of life -- you just hang around until you get used to it.”
― Charles Schultz

tags: humor, life, wisdom

1801 likes

#8

“It was love at first sight, at last sight, at ever and ever sight.”
― Vladimir Nabokov, Lolita

tags: humbert-humbert, love

6116 likes

#9

“I don't think normal exists.”
― Kody Keplinger, Shut Out

90 likes

#10

“Life isn't finding shelter in the storm. It's about learning to dance in the rain.”
― Sherrilyn Kenyon, Acheron

3345 likes

#11

“Those who believe in telekinetics, raise my hand.”
― Kurt Vonnegut

tags: humour, telekinetics

10121 likes

#12

“Reality is not always probable, or likely.”
― Jorge Luis Borges

tags: reality

397 likes

#13

“Life itself is a quotation.”
― Jorge Luis Borges

342 likes

#14

“Heaven and hell seem out of proportion to me: the actions of men do not deserve so much.”
― Jorge Luis Borges

tags: eternity, heaven, hell

481 likes

#15

“Se pueden repetir los mismos milagros una y otra vez mientras nadie recuerde la última vez”
― Chuck Palahniuk, Diary

3 likes

#16

“If I ever go to China, I’m going to find a piano and play “Chopsticks”--only not with my fingers, but rather I’ll be using two forks.”
― Jarod Kintz, Great Listener Seeks Mute Women

61 likes

#18

“My mom gave me life, so I gave her batteries. AA batteries.”
― Jarod Kintz, $3.33

2 likes

#19

“I’d like to tweeze all the Tuesdays of the year, and all the Mondays off my chest.”
― Jarod Kintz, $3.33

5 likes

#20

“I only sing in the shower. I would join a choir, but I don’t think my bathtub can hold that many people. ”
― Jarod Kintz, Who Moved My Choose?: An Amazing Way to Deal With Change by Deciding to Let Indecision Into Your Life

595 likes

#21

“I will never buy a fish tank, because I don't believe in supporting the funding of aquatic war machines.”
― Jarod Kintz, It Occurred to Me

124 likes

#22

“Every night I cuddle with a blob of unbaked clay I fashioned in the shape of a woman. But that’s what being in love is all about.”
― Jarod Kintz, This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucks

154 likes

#23

“I love money. I love everything about it. I bought some pretty good stuff. Got me a $300 pair of socks. Got a fur sink. An electric dog polisher. A gasoline powered turtleneck sweater. And, of course, I bought some dumb stuff, too.”
― Steve Martin

tags: humor, money, nonsense, rich

162 likes

#24

“Larry Bird looks like a bird, and Johnny Vagina looks like—hey, what is that in the sky? ”
― Jarod Kintz, This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucks

13 likes

#25

“I would always rather be happy than dignified.”
― Charlotte Brontë, Jane Eyre

10630 likes

#26

“NASA spent millions of dollars inventing the ball-point pen so they could write in space. The Russians took a pencil.”
― Will Chabot

tags: humor, science, space-exploration

24 likes

#27

“I dreamt that my hair was kempt. Then I dreamt that my true love unkempt it.”
― Ogden Nash

22 likes

#28

“Okay, so I’m the dragon. Big deal. You still get to be the hero.”
― Richard Siken

141 likes

#29

“Humanity, I’m sure I do not have to tell Your Grace, is a strange animal.”
― Kady Cross, The Girl in the Steel Corset

28 likes

#30

“When the clock reads 3:00, I don’t call it three o’clock, I call it three hundred, and I remember the Spartans. At 3:01, however, I remember what I was doing at 2:59, and I get back to it. ”
― Jarod Kintz, The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink.

94 likes

#31

“Don’t try to hog loneliness and keep it all to yourself. Share it with a special someone.”
― Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not for Sale

303 likes

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