Joke > Joke's Quotes

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  • #1
    Jim Henson
    “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye.”
    Jim Henson

  • #2
    Oscar Wilde
    “I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.”
    Oscar Wilde, The Happy Prince and Other Stories

  • #3
    E.L. Doctorow
    “Writing is a socially acceptable form of schizophrenia.”
    E.L. Doctorow

  • #4
    “There is nothing better than a friend, unless it is a friend with chocolate.”
    Linda Grayson

  • #5
    Steve  Martin
    “A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.”
    Steve Martin

  • #6
    P.J. Tracy
    “If anyone ever told five-year-olds the truth about life, he thought, there’d be a rash of kindergarten suicides. ”
    P.J. Tracy, Live Bait

  • #7
    “Life is like that - twenty minutes of misery for every two seconds of joy.”
    V.C. Andrews, If There Be Thorns

  • #8
    Oscar Wilde
    “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
    Oscar Wilde

  • #9
    Marcus Tullius Cicero
    “A room without books is like a body without a soul.”
    Marcus Tullius Cicero

  • #10
    William W. Purkey
    “You've gotta dance like there's nobody watching,
    Love like you'll never be hurt,
    Sing like there's nobody listening,
    And live like it's heaven on earth.”
    William W. Purkey

  • #11
    Mark Twain
    “If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.”
    Mark Twain

  • #12
    I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control
    “I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.”
    Marilyn Monroe

  • #13
    Suzanne Collins
    “I wish I could freeze this moment, right here, right now and live in it forever.”
    Suzanne Collins, Catching Fire

  • #14
    Jeffery Deaver
    “Sometimes you can't be what you ought to be, you can't have what you ought to have.”
    Jeffery Deaver, The Bone Collector

  • #15
    Stephen  King
    “The scariest moment is always just before you start.”
    Stephen King, On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft

  • #16
    Harlan Ellison
    “You are not entitled to your opinion. You are entitled to your informed opinion. No one is entitled to be ignorant.”
    Harlan Ellison

  • #17
    Justin Halpern
    “You're like a tornado of bullshit right now. We'll talk again when your bullshit dies out over someone else's house.”
    Justin Halpern, Sh*t My Dad Says

  • #18
    Those who don't believe in magic will never find it.
    “Those who don't believe in magic will never find it.”
    Roald Dahl

  • #19
    Ransom Riggs
    “I used to dream about escaping my ordinary life, but my life was never ordinary. I had simply failed to notice how extraordinary it was.”
    Ransom Riggs, Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children

  • #20
    Ransom Riggs
    “When someone won't let you in, eventually you stop knocking.”
    Ransom Riggs, Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children

  • #21
    Ransom Riggs
    “We cling to our fairy tales until the price for believing in them becomes too high.”
    Ransom Riggs, Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children

  • #22
    Albert Einstein
    “Logic will get you from A to Z; imagination will get you everywhere.”
    Albert Einstein

  • #23
    Tess Gerritsen
    “I know there’s evil in the world, and there always has been. But you don’t need to believe in Satan or demons to explain it. Human beings are perfectly capable of evil all by themselves.”
    Tess Gerritsen, The Mephisto Club

  • #24
    J.K. Rowling
    “If you want to know what a man's like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals.”
    J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

  • #25
    Chuck Palahniuk
    “Just for the record, the weather today is calm and sunny, but the air is full of bullshit.”
    Chuck Palahniuk, Diary

  • #26
    Oscar Wilde
    “We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.”
    Oscar Wilde, Lady Windermere's Fan

  • #27
    Frank Zappa
    “So many books, so little time.”
    Frank Zappa

  • #28
    Ilona Andrews
    “Curran looked back at me. "Why is it you always attract creeps?"

    "You tell me." Ha! Walked right into that one, yes, he did.”
    Ilona Andrews, Magic Strikes

  • #29
    Ilona Andrews
    “Here, Kitty, Kitty, Kitty...”
    Ilona Andrews, Magic Bites

  • #30
    Ilona Andrews
    “I don't want it to be attributed to a loss of control on my part. When I throw you out of the window, I want there to be no doubt the act was deliberate.”
    Ilona Andrews, Magic Burns



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