Shira > Shira's Quotes

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#1

“Don't be so humble - you are not that great.”
― Golda Meir

tags: funny, golda, meir, true

3531 likes

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#2

“Puns are the highest form of literature.”
― Alfred Hitchcock

tags: funny, humor, literature, puns

2179 likes

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#3

“What's a dementor?"
I mean, I can't even. "Nora, you are no longer my sister."
"So it's some Harry Potter thing," she says.”
― Becky Albertalli, Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda

tags: funny, harry-potter-reference

614 likes

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#4

“Everyone has a sense of humor. If you don't laugh at jokes, you probably laugh at opinions.”
― Criss Jami, Killosophy

tags: be-yourself, being-yourself, clever, comedic, differences, everyone, funny, funny-but-true, humor, ignorance, jokes, laughter, mockery, opinions, personality, personality-types, sense-of-humor, similarities, stupidity, traits, types, witty

314 likes

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#5

“I didn't have time to write a short letter, so I wrote a long one instead.”
― Mark Twain

1681 likes

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#6

“Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair.”
― George Burns

tags: humor, politics

1228 likes

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#7

“Personally, I'm always ready to learn, although I do not always like being taught.”
― Winston S. Churchill

tags: humor

1267 likes

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#8

“You should try not to talk so much, friend. You'll sound far less stupid that way.

- Breeze”
― Brandon Sanderson, Mistborn: The Final Empire

tags: humor, remaining-silent, reticence

1485 likes

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#9

“He attacked everything in life with a mix of extraordinary genius and naive incompetence, and it was often difficult to tell which was which.”
― Douglas Adams

tags: humor

931 likes

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#10

“Try not to have a good time...this is supposed to be educational.”
― Charles Schultz

tags: education, humor

830 likes

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#11

“Those people who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.”
― Isaac Asimov

tags: humor

924 likes

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#12

“An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.”
― Winston S. Churchill

tags: appeasement, human, humor, nature, politics

833 likes

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#13

“As I am sure you know, when people say 'It's my pleasure,' they usually mean something along the lines of, 'There's nothing on Earth I would rather do less.' [...]”
― Lemony Snicket, The Penultimate Peril

697 likes

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#14

“A sword never kills anybody; it is a tool in the killer's hand.”
― Seneca

tags: swords, weapons

198 likes

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#15

“You speak an infinite deal of nothing.”
― William Shakespeare, The Merchant of Venice

tags: insults, shakespeare

4223 likes

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#16

“Never miss a good chance to shut up.”
― Will Rogers

tags: advice, funny, reticence, silence

2623 likes

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