Aunt Jettie Quotes

“Grandma Ruthie and her sister Jettie hadn't spoken a civil word in about fifteen years. Their last exchange was Ruthie's leaning over Jettie's coffin and whispering, "If you'd married and had children, there would be more people at your funeral." Of course, at the reading of Aunt Jettie's will, Grandma Ruthie was handed an enveloped containing a carefully folded high-resolution picture of a baboon's butt. That pretty much summed up their relationship.”
― Molly Harper, Nice Girls Don't Have Fangs

“Aunt Jettie: "yes, i'm wandering the earth seeking revenge on ben & jerry for giving me the fat a$$ and coronary & I give out love advice to the tragically lonely."

jane: "Is that an ironic eternal punishment for the lady who died an eighty-one year old spinster."

jettie: "single by choice you twirp."

jane: "banshee."

jettie: "bloodsucker.”
― Molly Harper, Nice Girls Don't Have Fangs

“I look like Barbara Bush in drag." Aunt Jettie”
― Molly Harper, Nice Girls Don't Have Fangs

“She's your mother. I asked, Plus, you do look a bit like her. When you're angry, you both get these tense lines around your mouth...Look, there they are.”
― Molly Harper, Nice Girls Don't Have Fangs