Carrot Quotes

“In my first video diary I explained my love for women who have a taste in carrots. Since then, I have received plenty of carrots. Now I also have a keen interest in women who like Lamborghinis.”
― Louis Tomlinson

“I needed to say something. Something romantic! Something to sweep her off her feet.
"You’re like a potato!" I shouted after her. "In a minefield."
She froze in place. Then she spun on me, her face lit by a half-grown fruit. “A potato,” she said flatly. “That’s the best you can do? Seriously?”
“It makes sense,” I said. “Listen. You’re strolling through a minefield, worried about getting blown up. And then you step on something, and you think, ‘I’m dead.’ But it’s just a potato. And you’re so relieved to find something so wonderful when you expected something so awful. That’s what you are. To me.”
“A potato.”
“Sure. French fries? Mashed potatoes? Who doesn’t like potatoes?”
“Plenty of people. Why can’t I be something sweet, like a cake?”
“Because cake wouldn’t grow in a minefield. Obviously.”
She stared down the hallway at me for a few moments, then sat on an overgrown set of roots.
Sparks. She seemed to be crying. Idiot! I thought at myself, scrambling through the foliage. Romantic. You were supposed to be romantic, you slontze! Potatoes weren’t romantic. I should have gone with a carrot.”
― Brandon Sanderson, Firefight

“Have - have you got an appointment?' he said.
'I don't know,' said Carrot. 'Have we got an appointment?'
'I've got an iron ball with spikes on,' Nobby volunteered.
'That's a morningstar, Nobby.'
'Is it?'
'Yes,' said Carrot. 'An appointment is an engagement to see someone, while a morningstar is a large lump of metal used for viciously crushing skulls. It is important not to confuse the two, isn't it, Mr-?' He raised his eyebrows.
'Boffo, sir. But-'
'So if you could perhaps run along and tell Dr Whiteface we're here with an iron ball with spi- What am I saying? I mean, without an appointment to see him? Please? Thank you.”
― Terry Pratchett, Men at Arms

“I mean, it's a good job we've got a last desperate million-to-one chance to rely on, or we'd really be in trouble!”
― Terry Pratchett, Guards! Guards!

“This signior is sound, safe, ready, and dumb
As ever was candle, carrot, or thumb;
Then away with these nasty devices, and show
How you rate the just merits of Signior Dildo.”
― John Wilmot, The Complete Poems

“Sergeant Colon was lost in admiration. He’d seen people bluff on a bad hand, but he’d never seen anyone bluff with no cards.”
― Terry Pratchett, Men at Arms

“Dangling a carrot in front of a donkey—or anyone else for that matter—is not nice, and not fair, unless you eventually plan to give it up to them.”
― Vera Nazarian, The Perpetual Calendar of Inspiration

“Men who’ve made choices always feel they own their destiny. Few ever think to ask who shaped and offered up those choices. Who dangles the carrot they think they’ve chosen to follow.”
― Mark Lawrence, Prince of Fools

“Have you ever really watched him? I bet he'd found out everything about Jabbar by the time he'd talked to him for ten minutes. I bet he knows the name of every camel. And he'll remember it all. People don't take that much interest in other people, usually.' Her fingers idly traced a pattern in the sand. 'So he makes you feel important.'
'Politicians do that-' Vimes began.
'Not the way he does, believe me. I expect Lord Vetinari remembers facts about people-'
'Oh, you'd better believe that!'
'-but Carrot takes an interest. He doesn't even think about it. He makes space in his head for people. He takes an interest, and so people think they're intesting. They feel... better when he's around.”
― Terry Pratchett, Jingo

“When you’re eating your supper, you can look down at your plate and say, my, that’s a fine-looking carrot, and you’ll think of me.”

“I don’t want to think of you when I look at a damn carrot.”
― Kim Liggett, The Grace Year

“When I make duck soup, I add an extra pinch of Simply Red’s hit song “Holding Back The Years.” It makes a better emulsifier than peeled carrots.”
― Jarod Kintz, Music is fluid, and my saxophone overflows when my ducks slosh in the sounds I make in elevators.

“Congratulations! You've correctly discerned the difference between a sitting U.S. senator and a slightly moldy root vegetable. For your skill, you'll receive this limited edition commemorative digital photo. ”
― MoveOn.org

“One little girl didn't mind the fading sun. Her mittened hands sculpted a snowman, happy to work without distractions. She whispered apologies as she thrust a carrot into his face, assuring him it was for the best and he'd be able to breathe much better now, just try and see.”
― Angela Panayotopulos, The Wake Up

“When I go to art museums, I push a bag of midget carrots in a baby stroller, and it feels like the stuff on the wall is watching me. As a fatheresque person of curiosity, I feel misunderstood, but at least The Ducks know me.”
― Jarod Kintz, Music is fluid, and my saxophone overflows when my ducks slosh in the sounds I make in elevators.

“The rabbit thinks his paradise is a place full of carrots, until he finds a place full of carrots! A place filled with the things you love so much that you get tired of them would not be heaven, but hell at best!”
― Mehmet Murat ildan

“Của cho không bằng cách cho”
― Adrian Gostick, The 24-Carrot Manager

“All carrots dissapear one day, and so nature goes.”
― Monaristw

“Sometimes a carrot is just a carrot.”
― Monariatw

“When the donkey rides we shall then know that the carrot drew the short straw.”
― Anthony T. Hincks

“In my opinion, almost nothing improves a good carrot cupcake, but this recipe changed my mind. I tasted something similar at a small farmer's market; a young woman was selling dense carrot muffins along with her homemade saffron syrup and apricot-saffron jam. Her secret: infuse the eggs with the saffron the night before you want to bake. I don't usually organize my baking twenty-four hours in advance, so I tried adding saffron on the day and it still works wonders--- the subtle perfume infuses the cupcakes perfectly. These are terrific without the icing for breakfast or a lunchbox, but I have a love affair with cream-cheese frosting, so why not gild the lily.”
― Elizabeth Bard, Picnic in Provence: A Memoir with Recipes