Dudley Dursley Quotes

“No, thanks," said Harry. "The toilet's never had anything as horrible as your head down it— it might be sick." Then he ran, before Dudley could work out what he'd said.”
― J.K. Rowling , Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone

“But...surely you know where your nephew is going?' she asked, looking bewildered.
'Certainly we know,' said Vernon Dursley. 'He's off with some of your lot, isn't he?
Right, Dudley, let's get in the car, you heard the man, we're in a hurry.'
Again, Vernon Dursley marched as far as the front door, but Dudley did not follow.
'Off with some of our lot?'
Hestia looked outraged. Harry had met the attitude before: witches and wizards seemed stunned that his closest living family took so little interest in the famous Harry Potter.
'It's fine,' Harry assured her. 'It doesn't matter, honestly.'
'Doesn't matter?' repeated Hestia, her voice rising ominously.
'Don't these people realise what you've been through? What danger you are in? The unique position you hold in the hearts of the anti-Voldemort movement?
'Er - no, they don't,' said Harry. 'They think I'm a waste of space, actually, but I'm used to -'
'I don't think you're a waste of space.'
If Harry had not seen Dudley's lips move, he might not have believed it.”
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

“Jiggery pokery!” said Harry in a fierce voice. “Hocus pocus — squiggly wiggly —”
“MUUUUUUM!” howled Dudley, “He’s doing you know what!”
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

“How long have you been ‘Big D’ then?” said Harry.
“Shut it,” snarled Dudley, turning away again.
“Cool name,” said Harry, grinning and falling into step beside his cousin. “But you’ll always be Ickle Diddykins to me.”
“I said, SHUT IT!” said Dudley, whose ham-like hands had curled into fists.
“Don’t the boys know that’s what your mum calls you?”
“Shut your face.”
“You don’t tell her to shut her face. What about ‘popkin’ and ‘Dinky Diddydums,’ can I use them then?”
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

“Dumbledore paused, and although his voice remained light and calm, and he gave no obvious sign of anger, Harry felt a kind of chill emanating from him and noticed that the Dursleys drew very slightly closer together.
“You did not do as I asked. You have never treated Harry as a son. He has known nothing but neglect and often cruelty at your hands. The best that can be said is that he has at least escaped the appalling damage you have inflicted upon the unfortunate boy sitting between you.”
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

“Daddy's gone mad, hasn't he?”
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone

“Aunt Petunia often said that Dudley looked like a baby angel — Harry often said that Dudley looked like a pig in a wig.”
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone

“The fridge had been emptied of all Dudley’s favorite things — fizzy drinks and cakes, chocolate bars and burgers — and filled instead with fruit and vegetables and the sorts of things that Uncle Vernon called “rabbit food.”
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

“Yeah, but coming from Dudley that's like "I love you.”
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

“I don't think you're a waste of space.”
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

“They think I'm a waste of space, actually, but I'm used to—"

"I don't think you're a waste of space."

If Harry had not seen Dudley's lips move, he might not have believed it. As it was, he stared at Dudley for several seconds before accepting that it must have been his cousin who had spoken; for one thing, Dudley had turned red. Harry was embarrassed and astonished himself.”
― J.K. Rowling