Lawn Gnomes Quotes

“Lawn Lovely is a store two blocks from our house. It’s the place where Dad buys his lawn ornaments. A lot of lawn ornaments.
Dad is as nuts about lawn ornaments as he is about gardening. We have so many lawn ornaments in our front yard, it’s impossible to mow the lawn!
What a crowd scene! We have two pink plastic flamingos. A cement angel with huge white wings. A chrome ball on a silver platform. A whole family of plaster skunks. A fountain with two kissing swans. A seal that balances a beach ball on its nose. And a chipped plaster deer.”
― R.L. Stine, Revenge of the Lawn Gnomes

“Mr. McCall cradled his four casaba melons in his hands. They were still attached to the vine.
“I came out to water my casabas and I found this... this...” He was too upset to finish. He held the melons out to us.
“Whoa!” I cried in amazement.
No raccoon could have done this.
No way.
Someone had taken a black marker and drawn big, sloppy smiley faces on each melon!”
― R.L. Stine, Revenge of the Lawn Gnomes

“Of course, neat and tidy Mindy can’t stand the lawn ornaments. Neither can Mom. Every time Dad brings a new one home, Mom threatens to toss it into the garbage.”
― R.L. Stine, Revenge of the Lawn Gnomes