Married With Zombies Quotes

“Balance the world in your relationship. No one person should be responsible for killing ALL the Zombies.”
― Jesse Petersen, Married with Zombies

“Support your partner in their interests. You never know when batting practice, kung fu movie moves, or even a poker night might come in handy during a zombie infestation.”
― Jesse Petersen, Married with Zombies

“Put the small stuff into perspective. It's better to be wrong and alive than right but eating brains.”
― Jesse Petersen

“Make requests, not demands. "Please" kill that zombie, honey, I'm out of bullets.”
― Jesse Petersen, Married with Zombies

“I should have known that having "end of the world" sex wouldn't solve our problems. Though, it was pretty great and I highly recommend it.”
― Jesse Petersen, Married with Zombies

“Build mutual friendships. Just be ready to end them when your friends start trying to eat you.”
― Jesse Petersen, Married with Zombies

“I'd always thought the skinny little twerp was anorexic. But apparently what she needed wasn't a sandwich, as I'd often muttered as we left her office, but a manwich.”
― Jesse Petersen

“Because I'm not really certain she'd make the best travel partner through a zombie-infested city, he hissed. She gets confused by Scrabble.”
― Jesse Petersen, Married with Zombies

“Fuck me, David! Dr. Kelly just tried to eat us!”
― Jesse Petersen