Nidhogg Quotes

“I kicked a rib cage off my foot and swaggered around the tree as if I owned the place. “Hey there!”
Startled, Nidhogg stopped in mid-mutter. He stared at me, his huge yellow eyes blinking in confusion. Then, nostrils flaring dangerously, he let out a bellow that doubled as an impressive display of razor-sharp fangs.
My heart faltered, but I swallowed my fear and pressed on.
“Is that supposed to intimidate me?” I made a big show of rolling my eyes. “I’ve heard louder roars from Thor’s butt.”
Nidhogg flinched as if I’d whacked him on the nose with a rolled-up newspaper. “That wasn’t very nice.” He sounded so hurt I almost felt sorry for him.
Instead, I snorted with derision. “Buddy, I insult everyone.” I waved my daggers. “See these? They’re sharp, but not as sharp as my tongue.” Or your fangs, I added to myself as the dragon loomed in closer to inspect my blades.
“Wow. Those are pointy.” Nidhogg looked genuinely impressed. “Are your insults really sharper than that?”
“Mister, that question is so dumb it makes me think your brain is like Odin’s left eye socket—completely empty.”
Nidhogg winced. “Wow. That really, really hurt. But you’re right, of course.” He tapped a daggerlike claw against his skull. “My brain is empty. Of insults, anyway.”
That was my opening. I sheathed my daggers and cocked my head to one side as if considering something. “You know, I have some powerful one-liners that never fail to infuriate. I’d be willing to share a few, but what’s in it for me?”
Nidhogg scratched his belly. “Well, for starters, I won’t eat you,” he offered.
“Hmm. Tell you what. Let me climb up Yggdrasil when we’re done, and you’ve got a deal.”
Nidhogg stuck out a claw. I thought he was going to slice me to ribbons, but then I realized he wanted to shake on it. I did so, very carefully.
“Okay,” I said.”
― Rick Riordan, 9 From the Nine Worlds