Writer's Aid discussion

A dream sequence from a prequel WIP. The segment inside the ** is in italics in the manuscript. This is Brin's dream.


**He looked down at the newborn in his arms and smiled. The child stared back at him with bright black eyes. His heart filled to overflowing with love for this tiny boy. His son. He felt a soft touch in his mind and closed his eyes. When he opened them again, he was looking at...himself. He tried to say something but couldn't. Somehow he was now the infant in his arms. Confused he watched...himself pull him close to his chest and whisper softly. "Hello little man," his older self said as the love wrapped around him like a warm soft blanket. He closed his eyes, basking in the deep loving.**

Brin woke gently, still savoring the sensations, grasping futilely as they slipped away. Opening his eyes, he stared in the darkness at the tent over his head. Another dream, he realized. Another dream so vivid, so real...so strange. How could he be both the infant and the adult? Both father and son. For once, he was able to recall the words spoken by the adult - hello little man. Was this what it was like to have a child, a son? He hoped it was. The unconditional love he felt in the dream was.... He didn't have the words to describe how it felt. He never knew his father, his parents. He had no memory of them. They died when he was a toddler. The only parent he knew was his grandmother, the Dhe'an. He grew up knowing the security of her love. What would it be like having a father who loved him? Was it like the dream? Did it feel like that?

Sandaidh, I'd like to share a small tip. If you want to italicize the first paragraph of your story, then you can do so by using the following code:

< i > (Place your text here) < / i >

Just remove all the spaces from it. I thought that if I shared it with you, it would help.

Coming to your story, I think it sounds like a really interesting idea! I'd love to read more of this.

Thanks Hallie, that will help. Not only are dreams in italics, so is the telepathic speech.

Another of Brin's dreams.

He turned at the sound of something crashing through the underbrush. There was barely a moment of recognition before he was swamped with terror. He ran even as he realized it was too late. He screamed in pain when the boar's tusks ripped through the flesh of his legs, dropping him to the ground. Panicked he fought trying futilely to push the monster away as searing agony exploded throughout his body. Darkness beckoned as he lay helpless while the boar savaged him.

Brin flailed and kicked hard, trying to shove the boar away. Terror flooded his mind as he fought.

{Brin?}

Something touched his arm and he pushed at it violently.

{Brin! Wake up!}

The sharp voice cut through the terror in his mind and he woke with a start. Gasping for breath, his heart pounding ferociously, he lay still, staring in the darkness at the tent overhead. Moving an arm, he realized he'd been fighting the sleeping furs.

{It was only a dream,} he whispered. {It wasn't real. It was a dream.}

{Are you all right?} asked the now soft feminine voice.

{Hallah?} he questioned, turning his head to face the young woman sharing his furs.

{It's the nightmares again, isn't it?} asked Hallah, her voice filled with compassion.

Brin didn't reply. He didn't need to answer.

{Did I hurt you?} he asked.

{No, but you should talk with the Dhe'an,} she replied. {Tell her about the dreams.}

Brin rolled over and pulled her warm body against his. He knew she could hear his heart still thundering in his chest. He didn't care. He wanted, needed, the comfort of her body against his, her arms around him, holding him close while he calmed. Gods, this was the worst one yet. He still felt the echoes of pain throughout his body. He could feel.... He inhaled sharply and released it. He would swear he could feel the darkness closing in, the spirit fighting for life even as death beckoned. He shuddered. Hallah was right. It was time to speak with the Dhe'an. He was afraid and not sure if it was a lingering from the dream or fear of what the Dhe'an might say.

{Grandmother,} he said as he approached the Dhe'an, {I would share words.}

The Dhe'an looked up and gestured for him to sit.

Brin hesitated, suddenly unsure of himself. {Not here, Grandmother,} he said as his gaze met hers. {Please.}

She met his gaze and held it a few moments, then nodded and rose to her feet. Without a word she walked from the camp, knowing her grandson followed. Something bothered him a great deal. He rarely requested privacy to share words. With anyone else she would feel their anxiety easily, but he kept his emotions tightly shielded. That he allowed even this tiny bit was very unusual. Concerned, she led him to the Place of Stones. Stepping within the hidden grotto, she sat down on one of the border stones and waited for her grandson to speak.

Brin stepped within the circle of stones and paced. His thoughts whirled. He wanted to ask her about the dreams, yet he was afraid. He rubbed his hand down his face, then pushed his hair back. Maybe it was as simple as him losing his mind, the pressure of being Le'ir too much. He missed the privacy of the flat rock by the river at the old campsite. It was a comforting place to speak of things which were...uncomfortable. He stopped and faced his grandmother.

{Grandmother, I've been having dreams,} he said quickly before he lost his courage. {Not ones like those when the chi'an called. These are.... By leaf and limb, I don't know how to describe them.}

{They frighten you,} the Dhe'an stated. She could feel his fear, although he shielded it from everyone else. His mind was already strong and that strength was growing in proximity of Ta Mahaar Dara'a.

{Some, like the one last night,} Brin replied, {but not all. Some are filled with.... I don't know, Grandmother. What are they? Where do they come from?} He paced a few moments, then stopped and pushed his hair back again. He looked at the Dhe'an. {Why me?}

{When did they begin?} she asked.

{Not long after we moved here,} Brin replied finally sitting down on a rock beside her. {A few days before Ceera and her newborn died.} He leaned forward and braced his elbows on his knees.

{How well do you remember them?} the Dhe'an queried knowing that dreams most often faded after a time.

{Very well,} he responded. {Sometimes too well.} He shook his head as if to dislodge them from his memory. {If I close my eyes I can see each one so clearly it's as if I'm living it.}

{Describe the first one,} she requested.

{I.... Leaf and limb...,} Brin said as he scrubbed his hands through his hair. He didn't want to relive that one. It was too depraved...repulsive...painful, but if telling could help the Dhe'an find a way to be rid of them.... {I was...somewhere. I don't know where. On something called a ship.} He closed his eyes despite not wanting to see the images again. {I was tied to a tall pole. There were no trees anywhere. The ground rocked beneath my feet. I was terrified but I didn't try to get away. I couldn't. There was nowhere to go. I felt a searing burn across my bare back and screamed with the pain. Again and again the pain erupted on my back, until I couldn't scream any longer.} He turned his anguished gaze to his grandmother. {The pain was.... I can still feel it.} He trembled.

The Dhe'an laid her hand on his arm to comfort and steady him. {Go on,} she said quietly.

Brin inhaled deeply and released the air, gathering the strength to continue. He cradled his head in his shaking hands. {I was pulled away from the pole and beaten until I couldn't stand. When pulled to my feet, my arm broke.} He looked at his grandmother. {I felt the bones break, felt the pain. Then I was pushed face down over something hard and...and...oh Gods. The last thing I remember was being...raped.}