Perspective Plus discussion

This triggered from another thread about the FX show "Louie" and a recent episode where the title character is ranted at by larger woman (see "Sounds like a plus" for the full details). She talks about double standards regarding overweight men not wanting to date overweight women and the pressures on women to be attractive. This is true. You can say I'm fluffy, well padded, full bodied, fuller figured, curvy, plus sized or many other euphemisms, but if you call me fat, there is a line you have crossed.

I can be called obese,morbidly obese or even super obese and I am not supposed to blink, but if I say I'm fat or you say I'm fat, it's like you just had a loud toxic fart in church during the silent prayer. Everyone reacts, and distances themselves from it as quickly as possible. Why do we to that?

I remember an article I read years ago about sitcom wives who were "hot" and their husbands who were "not". The example was "According to Jim" which was big at the time, and how Jim Belushi's character was married to Courtney Thorne Smith and how she was this very attractive woman with this not so blatantly attractive man. It was a cited sitcom trend to pair shlubby guys with hot wives. You see this as far back as the "Honeymooners" with Audrey Meadows teamed with Jackie Gleason,"The Flintstones","The Jetsons","Bewitched", "The Jefferson's (especially Tom and Helen), and other shows, both animated and non from all eras.

This implies things that perhaps we don't need to see implied or perhaps that back in the day, these men were their wives' equals in the looks department, and have "let themselves go" so as to speak after being married, while the wives "maintain themselves." What is up with that? Why do we still insist on clinging to this notion in this day and age? Because it's funny. Odd-ball teams work in comedy and that is why it is still done, but it does not reflect real relationships, which are not funny apparently.

I loved "Mike and Molly" when it first started and Narzain and I were convinced that they were following us around and writing down our conversations verbatim. It is a ground breaking idea that two fat people are in love, and married to each other. She's not bone thin and with this big guy, she's bigger too. "Roseanne" was along the same lines, but with an established married couple with medium aged children, so the idea that they were larger people was accepted as "oh, they must have done together" vs. "they were like this when they met".

In all of these shows, no one says "fat". Molly always has a pillow in front of her when she sits and/or has her laptop/magazine etc. to hide her size. Why can't she just be herself and sit. I don't put pillows in front of myself when I sit. I prefer them in back of me to be more comfy. I don't hide who I am and I don't see why she should have to hide either. It's not like she's a thin actress whose pregnant and her character can't be so we have to hide it or anything. It would seem that a fat actress on a show about fat people still needs to hide her fatness!

It seems that the media does not know what to do with healthy weighted women let alone fat women. For healthy weighted women, their curvy. If you are fat, if you are lucky, you are voluptuous, plus sized,full figured or zaftig. When they want to be mean, you're fat. Um, all those other words mean fat too, but fat is treated like a four letter word, held up there with an f-bomb or even, and yes I am going there, the n-word. I am NOT saying that the word fat has the same level of negative impact, but I am saying that we treat the word with the same level of revilement and inflict the same taboo's on the word fat as we do the n-word or the f-word. Fat is becoming a dirty word in our society, a word to be hated,a thing to avoid, a vile thing, that not only are you not supposed to eat, but you are not supposed to be.

Yet, we have double standard when in comes to who is fat and who is not. Men are big and tall, husky, portly, have a little gut on them, or are victims of middle age. Women go gray, men get distinguished. It is generally acceptable if men carry a few pounds, but women are not unless we are pregnant,then big is beautiful. Why is this so?
Because men have made the rules and have set the standard for beauty all this time? Because we have allowed ourselves to be brainwashed that this is acceptable? That we are too beaten down by Madison Ave. to acknowledge that we are human being's with feelings and thoughts we are entitled to? Perhaps a combination of those among other reasons?

Sure.

What it amounts to kids, is that we have allowed this for so long now, that fat has gone from a descriptive word, to insult to foul language status. It needs to stop, and it needs to stop now.
So, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat fat, fat fat fat,fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat,fat!

The more you say it, the more you see it, it kinda seems not so bad. I'm here, I'm fat, get used to it.

OK. Here we go..... fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat fat, fat fat fat,fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat,fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat fat, fat fat fat,fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat,fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat fat, fat fat fat,fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat, fat. I'm onboard with it!